So I've made three different copies to target different markets for my new Facebook Marketing book. I have to choose a main one to use and I'm not sure which: Original: http://www.nickjag.com/marketingonfacebook Personal Blogger Style: http://www.nickjag.com/2008/01/22/facebook-marketing-book-released/ Music style: http://www.facebookforbands.com Tell me what you guys think if you don't mind, and which you like best. And of course, what you don't like about any of them.
#3 is out for me. It looks dated. The banner is deep in #1 and #2 which will push valuable info below the fold. I like that the banner makes it clear what the site is about. But the headlines and copy aren't there yet. So I lean to #1 and #2. Something on the page needs to stand out after the banner, though.
I won't make any copywriting suggestions, but I will instead make a few marketing related ones. No matter how well the copy is written, the whole concept fails to address a very important issue, more exactly credibility. Of course the additional content on the website does help but a more subtle move would be in order. What you should do is to brand yourself as a consultant. If you don't intend to actually do any consulting services, than charge some outrageous prices for it. This way even if somebody does take up the offer, it will be worth taking the job. More importantly though, by presenting the e-book as a low budget option to your otherwise "stellar" consultant services, you will obtain an aura of credibility and trust me that brings sales. Hope this helps. Regards, George
Split testing. It's your friend. Since credibility was mentioned, I'll point you to some lines that are suspect. "The thing I love about musicians is that they’re persistent in promoting their music." "Hey, I know bands are cheap." "I was in one [band]" -- this after you just addressed musicians in the 3rd person. Figure out if you are or aren't one of the members of your target audience. I charge for this stuff, so I can't go into too much detail. Let's just say that you should talk to some musicians and get more in touch with the target audience. And yes, the copy needs a lot of work, but you'll figure that out once you start testing. Good luck.