Ok, I really have strict parents. Since I was a little kid, they've brought me up in the damn house.. Even when we were in our native place, they wouldn't let me hangout with friends (even near the house) when I was around 13.. Now when we're settled down overseas, their excuse for not letting me go out is 'foreigners are strangers, its not safe to be out among strangers'.. I mean cmon, im damn 16+ years old for god's sake.. I can take care of myself.. I know what life is and how to live it.. I really think they should give me a bit of space.. And the worst part is, they won't even let my friends come over HERE as well.. And for that, I hate to admit but.. I HATE MY PARENTS NOW! I know they've taken care of me for 16+ years and all.. 9 months in the womb thing etc.. I know it all.. BUT.. this is way too much, THEY SHOULD GIVE ME ATLEAST A BIT OF SPACE.. Im a boy.. I wouldn't go have sex with a girl and get pregnant would I? hah.. Maybe thats what they are afraid of.. Losing their so called 'reputation' .. I wonder what kind of reputation they maintain here in a foreign country??? Sorry for babbling too much, thats just an overview of my past/childhood.. Now lets come to point.. Im currently dating a girl whom I really love.. Been with her for almost a year.. She's a really fun loving girl who loves to go out on dinners, carnivals etc. Even I wan't to do that.. I can't spend time with her though, I really don't want this to be an excuse for our breakup, which might happen if this shit goes on for another month or so... My parents won't let me meet her.. Its not her, Its their doubtful minds crying out loud 'would my son go get drunk? would my son go get it into fights?' that stops me from going out.. I wonder when would they understand that, Im not a kid anymore.. I can take decisions for myself.. I know whats wrong and right.. and they themselves would know how much I hate drinking and stuffs.. I just want to spend time with my girl thats all.. What do you guys think I should do? Should I not listen to them and go out? How can I convince them that Im not their pet kid anymore? How can I make them understand that I do have hopes/dreams/desires and places I wanna go rather than this freaking house and its four walls I stare into 24/7.. Please help Cmon guys.. this really is a serious issue for me.. help me out, make a teen and his girlfriend happy, contribute to a really tragically connected couple who's longing to last forever.. (long story)
What I can suggest is, don't listen to your parents .. If you want to go - GO ! That's the only way on how to proof that you really know what you are doing ! You will go away 2 times, they will punish you, you will go away 5 times, they will punish you, you will go away 10 times - they will understand that there is no point of punishing you as you are doing the same ! As simple as that, and the best part - it works Methods are quite drastic, but cmon - it's only because you want it and it's your life .. They will continue to watch over you even after 18+ ?
Well that could work But what if they lock me up here? grounded forever? -_- And yeah.. I guess yeah, even when im 18, maybe i'd still be their baby .. I wonder if anyone else lives a life like mine.. Anymore suggestions guys?
How can we help you? I think the solution depends on you. If you cannot stand them, save some money, leave the house, work and live yourself. Contact your parent after some times and prove to them that you are independent. :: ads2help
I do earn a lot online, but they have my credit card.. they say Im too young for this stuff.. Its my money, but they are holding it back.. Not using, they just don't want me to have the money.. Whenever I need something for me, they go buy it and bring it back for me .. its not sweet anymore, its annoying.. I can help myself.. I just want to spend time with my gf.. I just need to find a solution to make them let me do this... :/ @ads2help: I've tried that before.. But in here, its somewhat illegal to go against your parents before you turn 18.. But I really need my damn freedom, and will do anything to get it..
No offence, but you sound like someone that could blow your entire earnings on your girlfriend in a night. I think your parents idea of keeping you in is wrong, however when it comes to them holding onto your, I hate to say it but I don't blame them.
Its not about spending money for her.. Its about spending time with her.. I can't give her the love and care I wanna give her if Im stuck in this house for the rest of my life can I ? I know 16 years is too early to get in a serious relationship.. But when your seriously in love,.. thats what matters, only that.. And Im starting to feel that my parents doesn't really want me to be happy.. If they really do care and love me, why wouldn't they wanna see me happy? why wouldn't they let me do what makes me happy? I wanna enjoy life.. I wanna be with my friends, my gf.. I wanna have a good time, not like this.. I can't spend my entire life with my parents.. they've got me trapped and I need to find a way to escape..
When I was young a lot of people lived the same way as you. It is 50% your fault and 50% your parents fault, all you can do is stand up to them with REASONING. Say what you think, and if they say something different tell them to fuck off as your going out. Don't be a baby.
They don't give a shit for my reasoning, neither they do for what I say.. They say my opinions or anything I say doesn't count cause Im too freaking young.. damn it! Whenever I bring up this issue, I hear the same old 'your too young baby'.. Im fedup now! I've been thinking of doing that, but Im scared of their reaction.. would they beat me up when I come back? They possibly can.. thats what Im worried about.. even if not my mom, my dad would..
Ok.. so some of my family members said that my parents can't trust me yet so thats why they won't allow me to go out.. so I've invited my gf to my place tommorow.. I'll ask my 'loving' and 'caring' parents whether they agree with this or not.. though I couldn't possibly think of any reason they wouldn't.. Well lets see, I'll let you guys know. Thanks for the help so far.. rep added for all replies.
If you're unable to communicate with your parents, then print out this thread and give it to them. If your parents are unable (or unwilling) to communicate with you, move out and start living your own life. Just remember that your parents are humans too, they've only got one of you, and they're probably worried sick about what might happen to you if they do something wrong. Talk to them. Talk to them. Talk to them... And listen to them too.
hmm this is why teenagers runaway or kill there family j/k honestly my wifes mother was like this I simply told her her duaghter isn't a kid anymore and needs some freedom not so politley we went out that afternoon and she was allowed out on friday nights at 17 if that don't work just get it on with ya g/f pashing her in front of your parents they'll soon want both of you to go and do that elsewhere
Your parents sound overly harsh. I'd just keep arguing with them, don't shout or storm off, just be reasonable and state your case. Show them you can be trusted. Same with the money, show you can be responsible with it and they may give you the card.
do you go to school? do you go to a all boys school? if not then ask them to explain that, i mean you can get a girl pregnant at school too so what's the point of not letting you hang out with your friends
Have you actually sat down and explained how you feel to your parents. In there own little way they probably think they are doing what is best for you, but in my experience, parents that are too restrictive with their children, often find they do finally get some freedom they end up going off the rails and doing bad things, due to the fact of being held back, they just go mad when they finally do get freedom. Talk to your P's and tell them how you feel.
ummm for me this is a real shock, I have never heard of anyone like you except in the movies. I actually never been in my house since the age of 0 (and that wasn't such a good decision since I started drinking when I was 12-13~). In addition to your own needs you have to understand your parents concerns, I personally would love to have such a parents because my parents are 180 degrees different and doesn't really care about my deeds. I think that you should talk to them straight, just the same as you did here, talk straightly from your heart, don't omit anything and feel free to talk about your concerns once. It's will be kinda hard in the next few days after this heart-breaking speech but I'm sure they will understand and will try to come toward you on this. Tell us what you did, it's kinda interesting though (I'm feeling like a drama movie )
Looks like you'd never communicated these feelings with your parents. If holding you this way is your parents' mistake, holding back your feelings without communicating to them is yours. Most issues are resolved by communication. If you cannot voice your feelings to them, diarise the feelings and see that they read it, or else write a letter to them, in case that is also not possible ask your buddy to go and talk to them. But I still wish you talk to them directly. If they sincerely love you they will retrospect their attitude towards you, lest think of filing a domestic violence suit against them.
At the end of the day they are still your parents and they only want whats best for you, but they are being a little over protective, maybe speak to them and see if yo can't come up with some sort of understanding, maybe they go with you the first time and see what you do and let them meet your girlfriend and maybe even her parents.