Squeeze Page - Please review! - Rep will be given. ;)

My site is here.

I know it may seem to demean myself to ask for a review, but I'm interested in what goes through your mind when you read this page. Thank you!

 

The "Make money sitting" background is a bit distracting. Perhaps fade it a little? It's also cut off on the right side.

A little more content should be put in there to describe exactly what you are getting.

Perhaps a single "Make Money Sitting" header centered on the page?

 

Hello yyyk9.

I'll do my best at this review and share points that I think could be useful.

My Thoughts

Background
I found your back ground could be done a bit better. Right now it has an image of some money and uses Word Art for the text. I'd recommend a custom back ground... that flows smoothly and doesn't take visitors away from the content of your site.





Title Target Wording
I'd suggest that you re-word your title target text that is in red. At the end it reads '...And he's giving it to you Free!'.... I'd recommend that you change it to.... 'And you will be getting this for Free!' ... the first one doesn't flow in with the letter below it....





Letter Format
I'd recommend touching up the letter a little more.... so that it flows better. Right now... its all over the place... with different font sizes... font types and so on...

Email Form
Ohhhhh... that was annoying.... I used a dummy email account with my domain... and the next page was filled with stuff.... that I just could bear to read... to much info on one page.... and not really categorized... I find people really appreciate categorization... makes it easy to read and it flows..





Conclusion
Over all... your site does what it needs... but it could use more work... especially since the market you are after is quite swamped with people giving out free information.... or selling eBooks...

This review was done using IE6.02 on Windows XP SP2

I hope this helps you.
Respectfully,
Lhlalyam

 

Review:

1.) I DON'T LIKE THE BACKGROUND
2.) Compared to other similar sites, its neat and not bad. ;D

 

Like said before, they background is too obtrusive, I suggest making it plan and adding the logo to your main content as header.

 

I also thought the background is a bit too "loud"!

 

The Domain name has lot potential, but I doubt this effort could be get a fraction of it. I don't like the color scheme, Obtrusive Background, and the way you presented it. But I think it still do the pupose. The message is clear and simple.

 

Yeah, I agree with everyone about the background being too obtrusive. I found it to be really distracting... it's a little hard to read and focus on your content when you have such a harsh background.

The letter format is interesting but I don't think you'll attract many leads with your target market. You have to remember that the majority of webmasters have seen almost every landing page method and technique, so to get them to sign up you'll really just have to offer them hard facts about what you offer and not try to tempt them through persuasive language, big red headings and whatnot. It might work for other niches but it certainly doesn't with this one.

All the best,
Liam

 

Dump the background, honestly it looks like you are trying too hard... Make it more informative and not sooo fly by nightish.

 

Yes, make a custom background. That would make your site look better. Good luck!

 

The background made my eyes bleed, sorry...

 

ya id only change up the background

 

The background is a little distracting and I can tell it was made in MS Word. I think the sales letter needs to be longer!

 

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