some funny jokes

Discussion in 'General Chat' started by abboodeh, Jun 23, 2009.

  1. Moneo

    Moneo Peon

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    #41
    Nice ones :)
    Dont stop posting please :D
     
    Moneo, Jun 29, 2009 IP
  2. Moneo

    Moneo Peon

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    #42
    please dont stop...
    dont let this topic die...
     
    Moneo, Jun 30, 2009 IP
  3. jonjani

    jonjani Peon

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    #43
    Ok friends

    Get is More jokes

    Beautiful Child

    Teacher:prove that ab/ag+2mp+4wd+9mc+abc
    Student: a boy over a girl+ 2 minute pain+ 4 white drops+ 9 months course = A beautiful child


    Half Of 8

    Teacher: How much is half of 8?
    Student: Up and down or across?
    Teacher: What do you mean?
    Student: Well, up and down makes a 3 or across the middle leaves a 0! :D

    Sxy Ques
    Salesgirl: Sorry sir u cant smoke here.
    Customer: But i bought cigar from this shop.
    Girl: We sell condom also, but it doesn't mean u start f*cking.


    Boy Or Girl
    A: Just look at that young person with the short hair and blue jeans. Is it a boy or a girl?
    B: It's a girl. She's my daughter.
    A: Oh, I'm sorry, sir. I didn't know that you were her father.
    B: I'm not. I'm her mother.

    Holes
    Father:my five year old son is very naughty he made all our female servants pregnant
    Dr: how?
    Father: he took a pin and made a hole in all my condoms.


    Nurse Pssy

    Nurse lost her cat, nurse in d hospital:
    Any1 got a p*ssy?
    All women stood up
    I mean any1 seen a p*ssy?
    All men stoood up
    I meant any1 seen my p*ssy?
    All doctors stood up.


    Clever Daughter

    Daughter: Mummy that man gave me 10 rupees to climb that tree.

    Mother: Stupid !He wanted to see ur panty.

    Daughter: I am clever I din't wear any of them.


    Dont Do It

    Make Love to ur Girl friend On Valentine day.
    She Will Give u Gud News on Mothers day n u Will have a child on childrens day.
    Don't try this on everybody. U'll hv bad news on...
    Dec 1 (AIDS day)


    Dirty Mind
    Skin meets Skin
    When is that

    the skin meets skin,
    hair meets hair
    n balls disappear..

    dirty mind
    its when
    u BLINK UR EYES


    Door Bell

    Lady calls a men for repairing door bell.
    A men doesn't turns up for 4 days.
    Lady calls again, a men replies: I'm coming daily since 4 days, I press the bell but no one comes out.

    Couples B4 Wedding
    Why do couples hold hands during their wedding day?

    .?.?.?
    ....
    It is just a formality,

    like two boxers shaking hands b4 the fight begins !


    Orders
    Boss: Did you get any orders today?
    Salesman: Yes, I got two!
    Boss: Congratulations! What were they?
    Salesman: "Get out!" and "Stay out!"


    Fun with your girlfriend

    U are a...


    B. I. T. C. H.


    Beautiful


    Intelligent


    Talented


    Cute


    Horny


    r u smiling now?


    *YOU B***H*


    Making A Joke

    Father: Dear son This time you have to gain at least 95 marks..
    Son: No dad, I will gain 100 marks this time..
    Father: Why are you making a joke..
    Son: Who started first ..?????


    Style 2 Propose Girl

    New style of proposing a girl.. "i hv spent many sleepless nights in ur Luv n i dont want my son 2 do d same 4 your daughter so lets mk them brother n sister..


    Confession

    A man was dying n his wife was holding his hand 4 the last time.

    "I got 2 tell u sumthing hun" said the man very weakly.

    "It's ok" said the wife.

    The man insist, "I hve 2 say tht I cheated on u!!"

    The wife: "I know, juz relax n let the poison do its job."
     
    jonjani, Jul 1, 2009 IP
  4. tonsblogger

    tonsblogger Active Member

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    #44
    Hahaha, stress-relieving jokes, it makes my day...
     
    tonsblogger, Jul 1, 2009 IP
  5. catchmeifyoucan

    catchmeifyoucan Banned

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    #45
    [​IMG]
     
    catchmeifyoucan, Jul 3, 2009 IP
  6. catchmeifyoucan

    catchmeifyoucan Banned

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    #46
    Last year I upgraded from *Girlfriend version 7.0* to *Wife version 1.0*.
    I soon noticed that the new program began unexpected child processing that
    took up a lot of space and valuable resources. In addition, *Wife
    1.0*installed
    itself into all other programs and now monitors all other system activity.
    Applications such as *Poker Night 10.3*, *Football 5.0* , *Hunting and
    Fishing 7.5*, and *Racing 3.6** *
    I can't seem to keep *Wife 1.0* in the background while attempting to run my
    favorite applications. I'm thinking about going back to *Girlfriend 7.0* ,
    but the uninstall doesn't work on *Wife 1.0*. Please help!

    Thanks,


    A Troubled User.

    ___________________________________

    REPLY:
    Dear Troubled User:

    This is a very common problem that men complain about.

    Many people upgrade from *Girlfriend 7.0* to *Wife 1.0*, thinking that it is
    just a Utilities and Entertainment program. *Wife 1.0* is an *OPERATING
    SYSTEM.*.

    You cannot go back to *Girlfriend 7.0* because *Wife 1.0* is designed to not
    allow this. Look in your Wife 1.0 manual under*Warnings-Alimony-Child
    Support*. I recommend that you keep *Wife1.0* and work on improving the
    situation. I suggest installing the background application *"Yes Dear"* to
    alleviate software augmentation.

    The best course of action is to enter the command* **C:\APOLOGIZE* because
    ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the system
    will return to normal anyway. *

    Wife 1.0 is a great program, but it tends to be very high maintenance*. *Wife
    1.0* comes with several support programs, such as *Clean and Sweep 3.0* , *Cook
    It 1.5* and *Do Bills 4.2*.

    However, be very careful how you use these programs . Improper use will
    cause the system to launch the program*Nag Nag** **9.5. *Once this happens,
    the only way to improve the performance of* Wife 1.0* is to purchase
    additional software called *Flowers 2.1* and *Diamonds 5.0* ! *

    WARNING!!!** DO NOT* , under any circumstances, install *Secretary With
    Short Skirt 3.3*. This application is not supported by* Wife 1.0* and
    will *cause
    irreversible damage to the operating system. *

    Best of luck,
    Tech Support
     
    catchmeifyoucan, Jul 4, 2009 IP