Sensible Critique Wanted.

Discussion in 'Copywriting' started by Lazaru5, Jun 13, 2007.

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  1. #1
    I have just written my first ever press release, before i even think about submitting it i would appreciate the views of the more knowledgable/more experienced writers here.

    only sensible critiques please, tell me if there are any parts that need changing, if it's length is suitable, have i laid it out correctly, etc.

    please pm me for a link to it in .doc format.

    will add +green if thats allowed.

    thanks

    Laz
     
    Lazaru5, Jun 13, 2007 IP
  2. Lazaru5

    Lazaru5 Peon

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    #2
    many thanks to SpringCypress for his critique and his excellent tips on SEO, would defo give +green but apparantly i cant..

    thanks also to BSauer , who has also given me a critique, and some extremely helpful feedback. I feel a whole lot more confident that my PR has a good chance of being picked up.

    i would really appreciate if someone who regularly writes press releases could also critique it for me, before i submit it, i am pretty sure its ok but the extra confidence boost would be great.

    thanks

    Laz :)
     
    Lazaru5, Jun 13, 2007 IP
  3. jhmattern

    jhmattern Illustrious Member

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    #3
    I run a PR firm. However, I only do free critiques / edits if they're posted publicly so that others can benefit from them. If you opt to post it in the thread, I'll critique it for you. Otherwise, look for some past critiques here on the forum, and you'll see a lot of common mistakes I repeatedly point out, and you'll be able to compare that feedback to your release. Or review some of the tips I offer in the public relations section of www.BizAmmo.com.
     
    jhmattern, Jun 13, 2007 IP
  4. Lazaru5

    Lazaru5 Peon

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    #4
    i understand your reluctance to give a "free" critique, and i guess i would do the same in your position, its your profession after all and you dont make money by working for free. :)

    however, being new to DP i would really prefer not to post it in the thread, mainly because the intention of the release is to, hopefully, drive some traffic to my new website. it's not written in an advertising style, i haven't "bigged-up" my website in anyway, merely commented on it's unique nature.

    having read through the tips you have on BizAmmo i have made another change, removing a line that could have been seen as "promotional". other than that i am confident that the press release meets the expected criteria and am going to submit it.

    i had intended to use PRWeb, and just go for the basic (budget constraints) but before i do i wondered if there are any other sites that i could submit the release to? which sites do DP members use regularly or is PRWeb the best option?
     
    Lazaru5, Jun 14, 2007 IP