Relationship Advice: How Can I Overcome It?

Discussion in 'General Chat' started by Baby Boy, Nov 6, 2007.

  1. #1
    I got some real talk here...

    Here's the deal, I've been in a relationship with my fiance for 2 years and 2 months now and everything has been wonderful. Or so I wanna say. To say the least, I've been having a hard time to believe that my fiance still loves me the same way she did back when we first got together. Not that I'm saying SHE DOESN'T and she does wear her engagement ring all the time... but she socializes with so many guys that its hard to wonder if I'm losing her to someone else.

    Now let's be honest, I'm sure I am probably losing my damn mind somewhere but can someone who actually has been through something like this, give me some advice on how to get over this and how I can be able to tell myself to believe everything is going to be fine. I appreciate the help from everyone and I want to get this situated because its effecting my website and blogging work right now. And some real advice other then "Talk to her" please.
     
    Baby Boy, Nov 6, 2007 IP
  2. mishsu

    mishsu Banned

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    #2
    do not bother about the things that you don't have control of. do the things that she does,like hanging out with your friends. maybe she need some time for herself.let her. and time will come that she will realize how lucky she is for having you.
     
    mishsu, Nov 7, 2007 IP
  3. zeruel

    zeruel Peon

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    #3
    I've been in that situation before on my 3years relationship. And actually it's quite a pretty similar situation we got. Unfortunately, my ex-gf really broke up with me. Maybe mishsu is right. Just give her a little time to enjoy hanging out with her friends but better make sure she won't totally get over with your situation or relationship now.

    Or maybe you don't get along with her for some time and been busy on your work. Take her out for a dinner, go and watch a movie together, or a little vacation would be a help.
     
    zeruel, Nov 7, 2007 IP
  4. Baby Boy

    Baby Boy Guest

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    #4
    ^^ Thanks, ya'll have helped me... is there any more suggestions to addon? What do I do about worrying too much with all her guy friends maybe wanting to be a little friendly. Like I said, I understand her having "guy friends" but when you have a 9:1 ratio of guy friends, you tend to think a little bit. Not saying she is cheating on me or anything but it kind of gets me trippin' of whether or not she would leave me.

    I'll keep my head up in the long run :)
     
    Baby Boy, Nov 7, 2007 IP
  5. e10

    e10 Well-Known Member

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    #5
    So how many guy friends did she have when you met her? I guess you liked that she was not a girly-girl then but now you are feeling possessive and insecure. That is a horrible feeling but you are doing that to yourself BB. Stop obsessing and start thinking of ways to have more fun with her. If you are great to be around and you are keeping a the spark alive by doing things together, having a laugh, sharing experiences she won't have time to hang with her guy buddies and you won't have time to get jealous.
     
    e10, Nov 7, 2007 IP
  6. Baby Boy

    Baby Boy Guest

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    #6
    ^^ I'm not jealous and I'm not possessive, that's 2 things I know I'm definitely not. I mean, I trust her, I do, I just don't trust some of the guys she hangs with. When we first got together she was real quiet. She was the one who would do her classwork and wouldn't let things in class distract her, I was the class clown and always had people laughing and everything. So when we hooked up she (so she says) started coming out of her shell, which was good.

    The thing is that I want to have fun with her but its hard to even come up with ways of making her happy that she'd enjoy. But what female isn't :p its always hard to get a girl to have fun. Anyway, I am thinking of taking her out this weekend but she has something to do with her school apparently. And one thing I don't get is, she told me YESTERDAY that she was going to stay after school to get help from her math teacher yet when I used her cell to call my brother, I saw that she had called some guy after school yesterday.

    Imma prolly jus let her spend time with her friends and Imma try and my life right and get my businesses going. Thanks!
     
    Baby Boy, Nov 7, 2007 IP
  7. anions

    anions Notable Member

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    #7
    1. She's your fiance?
    2. You guys are still in school?

    Doesnt make sense to me...

    Anyways, all the best to you ;)
     
    anions, Nov 7, 2007 IP
  8. uglyboy

    uglyboy Peon

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    #8
    I think you just need to relax a bit and try not to be so insecure .. We all like a bit of space to do our own things and your girl is no different. IMO its all about trust.. If you trust her then it doesn't matter how many guy friends she hangs with. Obviously I don't the history or whatever but if she gives you no reason to doubt her don't doubt her.. The really shitty thing about insecurity is that it is the very thing that can end up driving you apart.. Just my 2 cents. (Obviously I'm not expert, Just a regular stupid guy)
     
    uglyboy, Nov 7, 2007 IP
  9. Tokio

    Tokio Peon

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    #9
    Well, if you don't think its a huge deal, and nothing is going on, then I'd try not to think about it too much. Let her have fun with her friends, just make sure she has fun with you also.

    As for having fun, you don't have to go out to have fun. Just doing simple things at home, like playing around can be fun. Things like playing around while doing dishes, wrestling over the tv remote, or teasing each other can be fun. As long as it's light hearted.

    If she has fun with you I don't think she'd want to leave you. Thinking about you would make her think about good times, playing around, laughter, happiness, so on. If she associates good feelings with you, then she shouldn't grow apart from you. Keep that flame burning.
     
    Tokio, Nov 7, 2007 IP