Please Review My Salesletter Before Launch - Feedback Appreciated

Discussion in 'General Marketing' started by dalvia, Jul 18, 2009.

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  1. #1
    dalvia, Jul 18, 2009 IP
  2. forumposter88

    forumposter88 Banned

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    #2
    He wanted to hire my company but he couldn't afford it. So, he did what many did...
    he attempted to build the website himself.

    It should be did, not do.

    Anyway, good luck!
     
    forumposter88, Jul 18, 2009 IP
  3. bobchrist

    bobchrist Active Member

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    #3
    I think you should do a press release.
     
    bobchrist, Jul 18, 2009 IP
  4. !!!!!What!!!!!

    !!!!!What!!!!! Banned

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    #4
    Very nice..Good design..Just add a disclaimer to it and you are up!
     
    !!!!!What!!!!!, Jul 19, 2009 IP
  5. Traffic-Bug

    Traffic-Bug Active Member

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    #5
    The only thing missing is a disclaimer, and apart from that everything seems ok to me.
     
    Traffic-Bug, Jul 19, 2009 IP
  6. dalvia

    dalvia Peon

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    #6
    thanks for the great feeddback. I really appreciate it. You all make very valid comments:)

    I'll get onto it today,

    Dale
     
    dalvia, Jul 19, 2009 IP
  7. forumposter88

    forumposter88 Banned

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    #7
    BTW, you can consider adding a "privacy policy" page on how you will handle client's information.
     
    forumposter88, Jul 19, 2009 IP
  8. wizardcrawler

    wizardcrawler Greenhorn

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    #8
    it looks great!

    for your headline try to emphasize on what one can "make" rather than "save"
     
    wizardcrawler, Jul 19, 2009 IP