Please Review My Clickbank Salesletter Before Launch - Feedback Appreciated

Discussion in 'ClickBank' started by dalvia, Jul 18, 2009.

  1. #1
    dalvia, Jul 18, 2009 IP
  2. TigerPublishing

    TigerPublishing Member

    Messages:
    451
    Likes Received:
    13
    Best Answers:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    35
    #2
    Hi Dale,

    I'm not sure the headline flows very well. There's an unnatural pause after "Website", and then you switch perspective on the "Plus Saving You...". How about this (changed parts are bold):

    Watch Over My Shoulder As I Show You Exactly How To Build Your Website Step By Step, Even If You Have No Technical Skills!

    I'd leave out the cash saving part unless that's a seriously big part of your sales pitch. It distracts the headline - are you showing them how to build a website, or showing them how to save cash? You'd probably say both, right? Well, which is more important to your target market?

    I skimmed the rest of the page and while it looks good at first glance, I noticed you had one feeble PS at the bottom. That's the part where you can really push the big benefits to close the sale.

    Include 3 PSs, and in each one remind the customer of your main sales points, and relax their barriers which reminders of guarantees and testimonial/case study proof. Use visual language to encourage them to imagine their life once they've bought your product and experienced the success you're promising.

    I also couldn't see any price justification, or any reason for the discount from $267 -> $97. It's important to qualify why you're pricing your product at a certain level. Many people see the price and are scared off, but if you can compare it to something they understand it might feel like much less money. For example, you might say that $97 is only $3.23 per day. So that's basically a cup of coffee a day for a month. If they can afford that, they can afford your product.

    Good luck :)
     
    TigerPublishing, Jul 19, 2009 IP
  3. dalvia

    dalvia Peon

    Messages:
    20
    Likes Received:
    0
    Best Answers:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    #3
    Thanks for your excellent feedback. I'll make some changes on it today.

    Thank you again. I really appreciate it!

    Dale
     
    dalvia, Jul 19, 2009 IP
  4. joydeep_priya

    joydeep_priya Peon

    Messages:
    16
    Likes Received:
    0
    Best Answers:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    #4
    I have although not much exprience but I think you put a link "Get The Complete Program Today! -
    Click to Get Started!" it will be better if you put a download now button.
     
    joydeep_priya, Jul 19, 2009 IP
  5. patswald

    patswald Peon

    Messages:
    239
    Likes Received:
    7
    Best Answers:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    #5
    my concern is with some images, the placing is a little wanting.
    also, the font type should be changed and be more centred and uniform.
     
    patswald, Jul 19, 2009 IP