Mightyb's sex and relationship advice thread

hay its very funny but nice post

 

I got the puppy. Now what do I do?

 

Mightyb:


Are condoms 100% safe?

 

HA HA HA Funny thread, I now feel like I'm a Jedi master, and being a 48 year old virgin, I'm going to take all this new found knowledge and go out and get some action tonight (as soon as my son goes to bed).
What's the easiest way to catch sheep? lmfao

 

It depends what you want to use them for. For carrying water or sugar they are quite safe

 

I think he wanted advice from the PIMP mightb -.-

 

Drink a bottle of wine, put your favorite CD on, look into its little puppy eyes and cry...

Nothing is 100% safe so you might as well just not use one.

What do you think this is? Some kind of joke thread? I'm here to give professional advice so don't ask stupid questions.

There is a pheromon called androstenone that sheep are particularly keen on. I can PM you a link where you can buy it. Rub some all over your chest and hide in the bush by the sheep farm. The trick is not to get noticed by the farmer. Wait for the wind to change towards the sheep. Sheep will come to you... (Not like iv done it before)

Shazz

You tell him! He clearly lacks knowledge in this subject.

 

Works best when still alive

 

sometimes when I go to the beach I get itchy in my bathing suit area. How do I relieve myself without seeming like a pervert?

 

He's my son, BUT ITS NOT MY FAULT!! The shopkeeper gave me a torned condom?!! What do i do?

 

RE: What's the easiest way to catch sheep? lmfao
What do you think this is? Some kind of joke thread? I'm here to give professional advice so don't ask stupid questions.

There is a pheromon called androstenone that sheep are particularly keen on. I can PM you a link where you can buy it. Rub some all over your chest and hide in the bush by the sheep farm. The trick is not to get noticed by the farmer. Wait for the wind to change towards the sheep. Sheep will come to you... (Not like iv done it before)


If there was ever a day I needed a good laugh, today is it.
Thanks, my night is so much brighter after reading this

 

Try washing at least once a month to avoid the itching in the first place

Tell your son he was a mistake and point him to the shopkeeper.

 

So, you're the bus driver, the bus is empty except for you:

On the first stop you pick up 3 people.
On the second stop you pick up 2 people and 2 people get off.
On the third stop you pick up 4 people and 8 people get off.
On the fourth stop you pick up 5 people and 2 people get off.
On the next stop you pick up 8 people and 5 people get off.
On the next stop you pick up 6 people and 5 people get off.
On the next stop you pick up 3 people and 4 people get off.
On the next stop you pick up 9people and 11 people get off.
On the next stop you pick up 2 people and 2 people get off.
On the next stop you pick up 14 people and 7 people get off.
On the next stop you pick up 5 people and 2 people get off.
On the next stop you pick up 22 people and 24 people get off.
On the next stop you pick up 3 people and 4 people get off.
On the next stop you pick up 9people and 11 people get off.
On the next stop you pick up 2 people and 2 people get off.
On the next stop you pick up 14 people and 7 people get off.
On the next stop you pick up 5 people and 2 people get off.
On the next stop you pick up 22 people and 24 people get off.

Now my question to you;
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How many infractions should I give you for this thread

 

Lets see...

I have 1 infraction
You give me 2
1 will expire 3 days later
3 more will be given for this reply
1 more for me complaining about 3 infartions given above
2 more will expire
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Now would you like your mushrooms boiled?








PS: Congrats on mod position!

 

Maybe they should just get a hotel room and fight it out.

 

After the third stop everyone is off the bus, so how could you drive to the next stop?