I can't comment on the loss of honour for that one family but in the eyes of the world this is seen by the world as a national disgrace - redeemed only by the man's arrest and hopefully he will get a fair trial. We've had them here, in NZ, too but exclusively amongst our "new New Zealanders". If there was one message I could have given that family, a week ago, it would be that you don't have to like her, you don't have to support her, but setting her free to live her life is what you do - you don't take her life from her. No perceived loss of "honour" justifies bringing disgrace upon your family, community and country.
Unfortunately, your message will fall on deaf ears with the people who need to hear it most. Like it or not, this is a clash of civilizations in which "norms" and "standards" and "morality" will likely never be agreed upon.
The issue is the lack of education. The majority of honor killings across the Muslim world (and the rest of the world, which happens but not as much) is done from ignorance and not knowing about their religion. In Islam for example, you are not even allowed to kill your spouse even if you see them having sex with someone else, let alone killing someone for committing a sin (which what this girl did in view of Islam). This guy's punishment in Islam is death without the need for a trail (since he confessed), however, that doesn't happen, again because of ignorance.
Thank goodness for secular societies where the law is not based on writings from a far distant era. In my country assault and murder are crimes regardless of the provocation. Your spouse is not a chattel and is allowed free will even if that goes contrary to your expectations or wishes. A trial is important for it may turn out that the guy was insane and the punishment might differ from that given to him if he were sane. Or he may reveal that he didn't act alone, or that he acted under the orders of another. If people give you shit about what goes on in your family you have three choices: Ask the family member to change Leave your family Get new friends and acquaintances If you view yourself as a complete person you don't need to take responsibility for the actions of other adults. Teasing is not grounds for murder.
If a criminal was sane, he would NOT be a criminal, so, in my eyes, insanity is NOT AN EXCUSE because ALL CRIMINALS ARE INSANE!
There is a reason that the phrase "do not judge" is held so high. That is because we all have preconceived notions. When all judgement is put aside and we look at things case by case, it is much easier to detect evil and deal with it justly. Rather than wanting revenge. And when that state of mind is reached, there will also not be excuses possible for those who transgressed so deeply. Regardless of history or religious/political convictions.