Learning copywriting - first attempts

Discussion in 'Copywriting' started by Tedel, Aug 5, 2011.

  1. #1
    Hello,

    I have just started reading about copywriting, and I find it interesting. It is something I wish to learn.

    I have prepared these first two texts. My idea is to post them on Craigslist or some other classified ads website. I'd like you to criticise them, please.

    #1
    #2
    Thanks for your first tips.
     
    Tedel, Aug 5, 2011 IP
  2. averyz

    averyz Well-Known Member

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    #2
    Bland.. No color, lame to read. Will probably just get diluted and lost on CL.

    The only one I like is "Email me {contact information} and let's start working." this makes it feel like someone contact you and get things done immanently..

    This one seems like a threat "If I don't reply in 24 hours, you won't pay for the first tip. " Makes me think What Ever. F@#K You.. threats with no leverage don't work. (never mind I read it wrong..) poorly written. Free Tip? that's worthless.. free tips are a dime a thousand everyone has a free tip.

    You have to be colorful to get attention on CL people weed through mass amounts of ads yours have to attract people.
     
    averyz, Aug 5, 2011 IP
  3. navidndc1078117

    navidndc1078117 Well-Known Member

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    #3
    When you make offers in Ads it's not only about the price you are asking from your clients but also about the services you are offering. Most people go for services in spite if it asks higher rates. So, you got to impress your targetted audience with the services offered by you. Your sales pitch in those writings were not up to the standards.
     
    navidndc1078117, Aug 5, 2011 IP
  4. yecall

    yecall Peon

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    #4
    Although there are all types of copywriting, these seem to be examples of ads. There are a few words that are not used properly. For instance, "and for other $7" should be "and for another $7." The words "you should not let go" do not necessarily make sense. Maybe "you should not miss" would be more appropriate. Good luck and keep at it!
     
    yecall, Aug 8, 2011 IP
  5. Tedel

    Tedel Well-Known Member

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    #5
    OK, thanks for the tips. I'll draft something different once I finish reading this copywriting site I found.
     
    Tedel, Aug 10, 2011 IP