Landing Page Review

I would like some critique and help on a landing page we are testing. Nearly 100% of our visitors are all using the iPhone, or another mobile device, so I am really interested in a mobile critique as well as a general critique on the landing page. We are doing ppc and other marketing for this page specifically to test out the market. I would like the critique to be based on results and how we can increase our conversion rate.

I don't care about my feelings. Please give me brutally-honest feedback. The landing page is:

https://www.beaweddingplanner.com/brides-library/personal-wedding-planning-system/

Thank you. I look forward to your feedback, and appreciate your time immensely.

 

Sarahk, thank you for the response. I'm embarrassed about that first typo. I can't believe we missed it. I type it a hundred times a day, and never used an apostrophe, so I have no clue where that came from. I really don't like the question marks either, so I guess I have to come up with something else. The purpose was to space the list out a bit, and make it still look good on mobile devices. The AAWP--do you mean the text? To add the full company name is too long for mobile, so we use the abbreviation. I can see where you're coming from. The logo is dropped just for visual affect, familiarity with Facebook, twitter, and other social media.

 

Just another sales site? LOL Not really. The economy and the industry has been changing over the past several years, and we are testing other sides of our market. Our course, which we sell is well over 600 pages, and written by a four-time mainstream published author. It's not just "another sales site". If you have any constructive criticism, I'd appreciate it. I am looking for call to action help, the flow and the funnel how we can gain more attention. FOMO, etc. Any ideas would greatly help. One word can make a world of difference. By the way, the typo had an apostrophe because of possession... "Mike's Drum Shop", or "AAWP's Bridal Guide", etc. I see how it could be read both ways and because of the line break, I saw it as well when you pointed it out, so I changed it. I took your advice on the images. I can't say I'm 100% satisfied, but there's only so much time in the day

 

Hi Michael

Your landing page is too 'noisy' ... there's too much going on even on the top menu before one starts reading the page.

A landing page that aims for some form of 'conversion' must be focused on the job in hand both in terms of looks and also in terms of content. Ray Edwards (one of the world's greatest copywriters) uses the phrase MWR > Most Wanted Response.

What is you MWR from that page? Focus on that. Everything else becomes secondary or irrelevant. By focusing, you can get targeted traffic and THAT does wonders for your conversion too.

In design/usability terms, you are trying to cram in too much: multiple font sizes, lots of different colors, lots of boxes, quote boxes, centered paragraphs, two column content etc. If you PM me, I will send you a link to a page I am building ... you can see how much easier it is to read mine. This does wonders for keeping people reading until the reader reaches the 'action' point which fulfills your MWR.

A great tool to use is 'Open Web Analytics'. It is a free tool that tracks you web stats BUT it also records the mouse movements of your page visitors. You will be able to run a 'video' of the mouse movements of every visitor! If you ran mine, you'd see I kept scrolling up & down to try catch the flow of your content. When visitors do not read straight according to your desired structure or scenario, they are confused or your content is not engaging them and that hurts your conversions and loses your traffic and sky rockets your bounce rate.

Note: OWA cannot be run at the same time as Google Analytics. Run OWA at least temporarily. BTW, OWA also gives you a 'heat map' ... you will notice on your page, the readers will focus on points that confuses them and then they just drop off. As you remove those 'friction points' one by one, your bounce rate drops, your 'time on site' average goes up and your engagement & conversions increase as will your search & Alexa ranks.

Now to the content: again you are trying to do too much too soon. You have not made the case for visitor to stay on your site and you have not made the case for that first offer box. In short, I highly recommend you use a copywriter from Fiverr or brush up on copy-writing skills.

Your copy needs to at the very least follow the AIDA formula: Attention, Interest, Desire, Action (your MWR)

Two final tips:

1- Get a tool that pops-over a nice offer box and place your special offer there. Set the timer for the pop-over to appear after the reader reads some way down. Doing it this way, enables your copy to follow much better so you make the case for your MWR. Yet you can make a special offer at more appropriate time. Remember nobody likes to be sold to them moment they step into your 'store'. You have to make the case first ;-)

2- Use Marketizator to split test headings and other elements of your site. Their free version is excellent and will be just fine for you.

I hope this helps
Have fun building your business to greater heights
Samo

 

The site looks pretty simple and decent.