TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find North America . MARIA: Here it is. TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America ? CLASS: Maria. ________ TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor? JOHN: You told me to do it without using tables. __________ TEACHER: Glenn, how do you spell 'crocodile?' GLENN: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L' TEACHER: No, that's wrong GLENN: Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it. __________ TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water? DONALD: H I J K L M N O. TEACHER: What are you talking about? DONALD: Yesterday you said it's H to O. _______ TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago. WINNIE: Me!
Lol nice jokes! ---- One day at class, Billy farted. Teacher: Who did that? Billy: I did! Teacher: Billy, get out! Now! And Billy got out and left them in the horrible smell.
That was really good... Thanks for sharing with us... I can definitely relate to this as my wife is a teacher.. She comes home with these stories all the time...
FEW from my side: Little Johnny returns from school and says he got an F in arithmetic. "Why?" asks the father. "The teacher asked 'How much is 2x3?' and I said '6'" "But that's right!" "Then she asked me 'How much is 3x2?'" "What's the fucking difference?" "That's exactly what I said!" -------------------------- A new teacher was trying to make use of her psychology courses. She started her class by saying, "Everyone who thinks you're stupid, stand up!" After a few seconds, Little Johnny stood up. The teacher said, "Do you think you are stupid, Little Johnny?" "No, madam, but I hate to see you standing there all by yourself!" ------------------------------- TEACHER: Johny, give me a sentence starting with "I". Richard: I is... TEACHER: No, Richard. Always say, "I am." Richard: All right... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet." ----------------------------- BEST OF ALL: One Night 4 College Students Were Playing Till Late Night And Didn't Study For The Test Which Was Scheduled For The Next Day. In the morning they thought of a plan. They made themselves look as dirty and weird with grease and dirt. They then went up to the Dean and said that they had gone out to a wedding last night and on their return the tyre of their car burst and they had to push the car all the way back and that they were in no condition to appear for the test. So the Dean said they can have the re-test after 3 days. They thanked him and said they will be ready by that time. On the third day they appeared before the Dean. The Dean said that as this was a Special Condition Test, All four were required to sit in separate classrooms for the test. They all agreed as they had prepared well in the last 3 days. The Test consisted of 2 questions with the total of 100 Marks. Q.1. Your Name........ ......... ........( 2 MARKS ) Q.2. Which tyre burst ?............ ....( 98 MARKS ) a) Front Left b) Front Right c) Back Left d) Back Right .....!!! You are smart but your teachers are always over smart Thanks PHYza
MATT: Daddy, look! I got an F ! FATHER: So ?! What's so good about that ?! MATT: I got the highest grade in the whole class ! FATHER: What makes you think that ?! You're supposed to get an A ! MATT: 'Cause F stands for 'Fantastic' and A stands for 'Awful' !
Nice good jokes to read first thing in the morning! Here's a couple from my side... Teacher: Could you please pay a little attention? Student: I'm paying as little attention as I can. -------------------------------------------------- Teacher: James, where is your homework? James: I ate it. Teacher: Why? James: You said it was a piece of cake! Regards, RightMan