Jokes (a little adult content)

Discussion in 'Movies, Music & TV' started by cheapest, Jun 15, 2007.

  1. #1
    Dave returned from a doctor's visit one day and told his wife Doreen that the doctor said he only had 24 hours to live.
    Wiping away her tears, he asked her to make love with him. Of course she agreed and they made passionate love. Six hours later, Dave went to her again, and said,
    "Honey, now I only have 18 hours left to live. Maybe we could make love again?". Doreen agreed and again they made love.
    Later, Dave was getting into bed w hen he realized he now had only eight hours of life left. He touched Doreen's shoulder and said, "Honey? Please? Just one more time before I die." She agreed, then afterward she rolled over and fell asleep.
    Dave, however, heard the clock ticking in his head, and he tossed and turned until he was down to only four more hours. He tapped his wife on the shoulder to wake her up. "Honey, I only have four hours left! Could we...?"
    His wife sat up abruptly, turned to him and said,
    "Listen Dave, I have to get up in the morning! You don't."


    another one

    Grandpa explains all.........



    An out-of-breath 7 year-old girl ran up to her grandfather, who was tinkering in his workshop, and confronted him with the universally dreaded
    (by adults) question. "What is sex...?"



    He was surprised she'd ask such a question at her age, but thought if she's old enough to ask, she's old enough to get a straight answer. He wouldn't shirk his responsibility. Steeling himself to leave nothing out, he proceeded to describe for her all the variations of human sexuality he could conjure, careful to impress upon her the joys and responsibilities of love making and procreation.



    When finally Grandpa was done pontificating, the little girl stood frozen, as though nailed to the spot, and looked at him with her mouth open, eyes wide in amazement.



    Seeing she was overwhelmed, he asked what caused her sudden curiosity. His granddaughter shook off her reverie and replied, "Grandma says dinner will be ready in a couple of secs."
     
    cheapest, Jun 15, 2007 IP
  2. mopacfan

    mopacfan Peon

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    #2
    The first one is really good. I'm going to have to share that with my wife. :)
     
    mopacfan, Jun 15, 2007 IP
  3. Silent Hill

    Silent Hill Peon

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    #3
    lol both jokes are great.
     
    Silent Hill, Jun 16, 2007 IP
  4. mitcharr

    mitcharr Notable Member

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    #4
    haha great jokes, thanks for sharing
     
    mitcharr, Jun 16, 2007 IP
  5. ServiceCube

    ServiceCube Peon

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    #5
    LoL dude. Nice jokes!
     
    ServiceCube, Jun 17, 2007 IP
  6. jupiter_online

    jupiter_online Peon

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    #6
    haha good ones =]
     
    jupiter_online, Jun 17, 2007 IP
  7. getjimmy

    getjimmy Prominent Member

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    #7
    Nice jokes,add some more.Thanks for sharing.
     
    getjimmy, Jun 17, 2007 IP
  8. Ezhel

    Ezhel Banned

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    #8
    whew! I like your jokes both 1 and 2, hahaha thak you for sharing, pls post more!!;)
     
    Ezhel, Jun 17, 2007 IP