There are dozens of sites which embed multi media from my website and its fine since they give a link back. But several do not. How can I manually disallow only those few specific ones from not hotlinking? Or are there scripts which I can use?
banning their IP is on option. Another may to block all hotlinking (assume you can do this with cpanel if this is what your host uses) and provide a scripted route for others to use where you allow them to use the images. It depends if you want to allow all and block only those you dont want or to block all and allow only those you do want
What kind of media are we talking about? If it's image or flash then you could use htaccess to ban their domains/IPs.
Its actually all flash. What would be ideal is if i can allow all websites to hotlink and only redirect a few.
Google for .htaccess hotlink redirection or something. I think this would be the best way to achieve what you are looking for.