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Google and my Girlfriend

Discussion in 'Google' started by mahnazkut, Feb 28, 2014.

  1. #1
    I have realized that Google search engine and my girlfriend behaves ironically similar!
    I would like to share some of the points with you. If you like, add more:
    • I can never predict or know exactly what she wants. Similarly, I could not know what Google wants from me to rank.
    • If I push too hard She runs away. I have to pretend that I am not desperate about her. SEO success in Google needs hard work but also you don't want to look like you are trying too hard.
    • Every once in a month she needs an "update". During this period, she behaves even worse and unpredictable. Google does same (penguin, panda, Algorithm updates..)
    • She hates to be cheated or lied, obviously. Even I am not cheating she could still get paranoid and crazy. Cheating your way to high rankings on Google won’t work, and even if it does for short period, you can be penalized for long. Even you are not cheating, Google can get paranoid and still slap you!
    • I have to be patient to get her love me, If I rush things it won't work. Also to rank on Google you have to wait and be patient.
    • I love her and even I complain about her, I cannot live without her. We all web masters complain about google but can't quit.


      Albert Einstein's definition of INSANITY : "Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results."
      For Google; If you do "The same things" to rank on Google it would give you different results!! You have to be Insane to be a SEO, believing doing the same f*ng thing but expecting different outcome.
     
    mahnazkut, Feb 28, 2014 IP
    danasurvey and Rado_ch like this.
  2. uttoransen

    uttoransen Notable Member

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    #2
    excellent comparison.

    here's one more. You got to buy your way through - gifts and stuff - but can't let her know that you are trying to buy your way into her heart. Need to keep spending, but you have to keep it quiet and maintain a low profile about your spending. Similarly - buy links and posts to rank well in Google, but keep it a secret :p

    thanks,
    Uttoran Sen,
     
    uttoransen, Mar 1, 2014 IP
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  3. mahnazkut

    mahnazkut Well-Known Member

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    #3
    Or buy Adword ads to rank, you can buy your love.
     
    mahnazkut, Mar 1, 2014 IP
  4. Barreiro Horic

    Barreiro Horic Peon

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    #4
    Nice thread, google also dancing ! your girlfriend can also dance, this is also something in common :)
    google-dance.jpg
     
    Barreiro Horic, Mar 2, 2014 IP
  5. danasurvey

    danasurvey Active Member

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    #5
    LOL. I love the post uttoransen! Google and significant others can both be temperamental. :)
     
    danasurvey, Mar 2, 2014 IP
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  6. mahnazkut

    mahnazkut Well-Known Member

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    #6
    That's brilliant! bing and others could be the one night outs or just dates. :)
     
    mahnazkut, Mar 2, 2014 IP
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  7. fadhi123

    fadhi123 Banned

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    #7
    [​IMG]
    google also kick your keyword from ranking sometime so your girlfriend also kick ?
     
    fadhi123, Mar 2, 2014 IP
  8. sarahk

    sarahk iTamer Staff

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    #8
    and guys are no better

    be too needy - they run a mile. Start a new site and tell Google you really want it's love, you can bet Google will be out the door
    the way to their hearts is through their appetite - food for blokes but google eats dollars
     
    sarahk, Mar 2, 2014 IP
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  9. dscurlock

    dscurlock Well-Known Member

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    #9
    Just rename your girlfriend to google and be happy....
    "hey google, you want to fool around..."

    now you can say:
    Got Screwed By Google......
     
    dscurlock, Mar 19, 2014 IP