Fat People Dont Get Beheaded

I just ate one for America! Dang is it good! Plus I ate 2 apple pies (2 for a dollar) to help get my gas moving..

D

 

I did some more drop sets, then stopped at Quiznos for a prime rib and peppercorn sandwich. Mickey D's is right across the street, and the McRib was tempting, but... Ah, so goes the diet.

 

quizno sandwiches have some nice gassy sauces.

Thanks for reminding the troops, Mia! Don't skimp. Eat the big sandwiches!

 

I usually grab about a gallon of their horse radish sauce and inhale it. YUMMY!

 

Does Kmart still have those pretzels with fake cheese sauce? Dang, if I remember right, those suckers gave me enough fuel to clear out the front line cash registers (at least to isle 20).

 

Ya know, I almost started dieting today, till I saw this.

I owe you BD! I think you probably saved my life!

{heading for Pizza Hut now...}

-Michael

 

Wow. I never had them. I'd like to add a big mortar blaster to my personal aresenal.

I'll go test it. Kmart shoppers....beware!

But on the other hand if I were working at KMart and BigDoug walked in...I'd get my @ss over to register 21 to avoid the gas attack

 

I'm not really sure. We don't have any K-Marts around here anymore. They all went belly up.

Venture used to have the best pretzels. If anyone remembers Venture that is..

 

Mmmm... pretzels....

We used to have Hot Sam Pretzels here in the Tampa area, no clue what happened to them. They rocked.

Damn. Got a craving now.

-Michael

 

Your welcome Michael! Never too late to become a Fat American! Let us know how your gas goes from Pizza night, OK?

D

 

I broke ranks and had Taco Bell last night... That's like the 3rd time in 2 years! Damn it was good... I think I gained an inch around my neck.

 

Good job Mia on a thicker neck!

Here is a new song for blowing up IUD's ahead of infantry!

Spread the word Americans!

 

Taco Bell: An all time winner for gas attacks. Congrats Mia: We've got the kidnappers on the run!!!!!

Just had a superlarge black angus sandwich at quizno's. washed it down w/tons of soda and of course chips. The kidnapppers will be keeping clear of me today if they value their taxi doors and windows.

 

Good news:

The anti-terrorist kidnapping plan is spreading around the world.

http://msnbc.msn.com/id/15588280/

 

Good for them! 60 million people in China considered obese is one great way to resist the H-Trimmers.

Now thats a county I will trade with!

 

Yep those 60 million Chinese freedom fighters have it figured out.

We can probably train them with regard to effective Flatulence! We have a well developed corps of experienced experts here.

BTW, BD, have your kids recovered from the Security tests yet? Are the skin rashes gone. Can they breathe without coughing?

What patriots!!!!!!

 

-Michael

PS: "I fart in your general direction" available in t-shirt format.

 

All of the Google Ads on my side for this thread have come up Peace Studies. I would have thought that Jenny Craig or Godiva Chocolates would have had a chance, but noooooo......

 

Whereas I get an ad targeting DP members (actually addressed to us) for hosting.

Who knew being "warped" made you a target audience?

-Michael

 

My kids avoid me in this time of war! So I have to sneak up on them and blast gas. No time like the present for my kids to see that we live in a dangerous world!

D