All of the information I have read states if you are infected you will not be able to browse to the Microsoft site or to anti-virus sites like Symantec. The virus essentially tries to prevent you from taking measures to remove it.
here is exactly you would like to know - How to be Sure Your PC is Not Infected with Downadup/Conficker Worm? More importantly, here is what you need to run - Tools to Detect & Remove Conficker Worm
Nice. It must be salmonella OR could also be symptoms of a person who have just bought a crap e-book here in DP lol...
For those who think they were infected. Visit kaspersky.com, they are providing free solutions/free removal tool to get rid of this bad ass Kido aka Conficker... Just browse the site at the left pane.