$5 for a good joke Cheer Me up..I dying.....for a joke

Enjoyed that one thanks

 

MY TURN!

read my thread =]

http://forums.digitalpoint.com/showthread.php?t=762980

 

No ......Hakkairu....let's be honest..that's not funny at all, sure you can do better

 

alot of people thought it was funny >_<

 

hope that one brings some cheer to you..if you are more happy not paying me $5 then also its fine just be happyyyyyyyyyyy

 

A guy goes into a bar with a pet alligator by his side. He hoists his alligator up on the bar, turns to the bar’s patrons and says, "Ladies and gents, let me make you an offer. I will open this alligator's mouth and put my private parts inside. Then gator here will close his mouth for one minute. After that, he will open his mouth, and I will remove myself unscathed."

"And in return for being such a daredevil, each of you will buy me a drink." The crowd murmurs its approval.

The man stands up on the bar, drops his pants, and places his unit in the alligator's open mouth. The gator closes his mouth and a loud gasp emerges from the crowd.

After one minute, the man, grabbing a beer bottle, raps the gator hard on the top of it's head. The alligator opens his mouth, after which the man removes himself completely unscathed as promised. The crowd cheers and the first of his free drinks is delivered.

The man stands up once again making another offer, "I will pay $100 to anyone who is willing to give it a try."

A hush falls over the crowd. After a short pause, a hand rises up in the back of the bar. A blonde woman timidly says, "I'll try it, but only if you promise not to hit me on the head with the beer bottle to get me to open my mouth."

 

Here's my entry, long but worth the read

 

Sorry for double post

 

I think it's great idea. I hope this one would like you.

 

#

A little old lady goes to the doctor and says, "I have this problem with gas, but it really doesn't bother me too much. The farts never smell and are always silent. As a matter of fact, I've farted at least 20 times since I've been here, and I bet you didn't even notice!"

The doctor says, "I see. Take these pills and come back next week."

The next week the lady goes back. "Doctor," she says, "I don't know what the hell you gave me, but now my farts - although still silent - stink terribly."

The doctor says, "Good! Now that we've cleared up your sinuses, let's work on your hearing..."

 

some of the jokes are really funny....thanks for sharing

 

One day Superman was feeling a bit horny. So, he began to ask his super hero friends for ideas on where he could get a bit of action.
"Hey Batman! Who's good in the sack?"

"Well Superman, everyone knows that Wonder Woman is the best sex in Comicland. Why don't you try her?" replied Batman.

"I'd love to, but Wonder Woman and I are friends. So I don't really want to take advantage of her."

"Damn shame," said Batman as he waved goodbye to Superman and drove off.

Ten minutes later Superman was flying low over a city when he saw the Green Lantern patching up a building. He flew down.

"Hey GL, I'm looking for a little action. You're a swinging bachelor, who's the best babe in Comicland?"

"Hey, Superman! Everyone knows that Wonder Woman is far and away the best lay in Comicland, why don't you try her?"

"Well, we're sort of friends," Superman said, "but I didn't realize she had gotten around so much" and he flew off in frustration.

Twenty minutes later Superman was flying over a field when he saw Wonder Woman lying naked, in the middle of the field, with her legs apart and up in the air. Superman was tempted. He thought to himself, "I'm faster than a speeding bullet, I can be in and out of there before she even knows I'm here."

So with a blur and a sonic boom he was down, in and gone. Wonder Woman stared up into the sky with a dazed __expression. "What the hell was that??" she exclaimed.

"I don't know," said the Invisible Man as he rolled off, "but my ass is killing me

 

Here are a few jokes that I love reading again and again..

----
Boy: I am not rich like rohit, I don't even have a big car like rohit. But I really love you!
Girl: I love you too, but tell me more about rohit..

----
An engineering student to his sweeper brother: I have got degree, I have got knowledge, I can sit in society. What do you have?
Sweeper: I have the job.

----
Q: What did the gangster's son tell his dad when he failed his
examination?
A: Dad they questioned me for 3 hours but I never told them anything."
----

 

Best yet possible winner, keep them coming

 

This is damn awesome

 

Not the best but funny...thanks

 

How about this ?

 

great one.

 

Ok what was the best joke....who gets the $5