How To Obtain A Better Writing Style With Active Voice

I've noticed lately that many writers are great at understanding big words, and even better at starting to understand what punctuation is and how to use it properly.

What I'm seeing less of is active voice- something writers shouldn't forget in their copy.

The Big Active Vs Passive Voice Debate
If you've ever taken an actual writing class, you've probably heard the instructor say something to the effect of, "Never use a passive voice unless you want a boring copy!"

So what exactly is a passive voice and how do you avoid using it? Let's see if you can tell the difference between the following two sentences:

Zac439 blew up the Earth.
The Earth was blown up by Zac439.

Now, given, both sentences are pretty action-packed! But when you really break the sentences down we notice something. The first sentence is an active voice since the subject is actually doing something, rather than being acted upon.

Subject Verb Indirect Object
Zac439 blew up the Earth
The Subject Acted Upon The Indirect Object

To turn the active voice into a passive voice, we take the object, the Earth, and make it the subject. The subject, Zac439, thus becomes the direct object.

Subject Verb Indirect Object
The Earth was blown up by Zac439
The Subject Was Acted Upon By The Direct Object

Notice how the Earth isn't doing anything at all. It's getting blown up, but it has no part in the action. Sounds boring doesn't it?

Who really cares? Isn't it easier to write how you feel like writing?

Yes, it is easier. But that is also why truly inspiring writers aren't your average college kid trying to learn the intricacies of passive and active voices. It's also the difference between low pay and high pay. Employers will want active content that appeals to the user with a unique voice, not something that sounds like a history book written by a high schooler.

Enough with the Earth blowing up, let's see a real example. Let's see which one you think is more interesting;

The hurricane, as it would seem, caused devastation to the poor seafaring town in its destructive path.

The poor seafaring town has been destroyed, thanks to a destructive hurricane that happened to move through the area.

Which one is the passive voice? I should ask, which one is less interesting? Obviously the second sentence is the passive voice since the action is indirect, and thus, less exciting. It also seems more "wordy" than the first. Add wordiness to the list of negative effects of passive voicing.

So who really uses passive voice, anyways? Actually, a lot of people do. There are certain situations where using it can't be avoided if the author is going to make a sensible copy. The following are perfect situations:

1. If you're a politician. Seriously think about it, how many times have you heard "Bombs were dropped" or "Shots were fired" from a politician? Notice how they leave out the agent doing the action. Who shot the guns? Well, we don't know because the politician is using a passive voice! We can't blame anyone now.

2. If you don't know the subject. If you were a mechanic which would you rather say; "Something broke on your car and I'm trying to fix it," or "Your car is broken and I'm trying to fix it"? If you use the former, you're implying that you're an idiot and don't know what's wrong with it. The latter will tell the customer that you're working your best on the job, and they should leave you alone so you can get back to work!

3. When you want to emphasize something as a businessman, scientist, or engineer. These three types use passive voices a lot, whether they like to or not. Put an emphasis on who did the hard work using the passive voice. "The work was completed by our competent employees" sounds a lot better than "Our employees completed the job" simply because the emphasis is being put on those who did the job. It's all about marketing- did you think a sentence structure could bring in more business? It can!

4. Mix up writing style. Yes, teachers tell you not to use passive voice. But I still like to throw in a few passive sentences into the rough just to keep things flexible. Remember that little thing called sensory adaptation? We can't have an action-packed story all the way through. (Ok, we can, but the effect will lose its potency somewhere near the middle or end. Remedy it by using a passive sentence and returning to the action once more!)

It all boils down to changing your writing style. But how do you do it without hitting the Backspace key every other sentence?

The easy way out is to use Microsoft Word, and use the writing style checker to help find passive sentences. This can be annoying however, and you'll be better off learning how to turn passive voices into active voices on the fly.

Some tips to go by may be that using "I" or "We" will usually constitute an active sentence. This isn't always true, but it is for most cases. Usage of a "to be" verb in any form isn't going to necessarily mean a passive voice either, but in most cases it will.

In the end, you're best off realizing that the subject should do the acting, not being acted upon. Then you're golden. Use these tips and watch you're copy turn into an action-packed work of art that impregnates all those who read it with adrenaline. Because in the end, writing should invoke some form of response from the reader (and blank stares don't count!).

Just remember to use the passive voice if you ever become a politician.
Good luck!


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Thanks for taking us back to the writing classroom because our every day activities often make us forget style simple rules like this.

 

Indeed this is a very informative post I saw today.
Finishing touch ...even better

Let me tell you ... I'd like to become a politician and I promise, I'd be active in abusing the passive voice

 

Usually I will omit 'I' or "We' and start sentence directly with an active verb in copywriting.

 

WoW, a really nice and well written about the using of active voice instead of the passive form...

Thanks for the class, zac

 

Ah.. That's something good I read at DP. Thanks

 

Absolutely fantabulous writing tips. I'd forgotten active and passive after middle school
+ rep

 

good tips...
i like it~

 

love the post. I always tried my best to write in an active voice.

 

Good advice for the DP writers.

 

Wow, you are an excellent writer. Thank you for sharing this samples for DP writers.

 

Great posting. Very basic, but important points for any writer.

 

Great posting I myself can use allot of writing enhancements to spice the copies I write up

great and thanks again

 

Interesting point of view. Thanks

 

Oh dear .... I found the passive sentences more enthralling! I'm doomed!

 

Sometimes passive voice can be useful - to point out that something has gone wrong, without assigning blame. You want them to go and fix whatever has gone wrong, rather than feel they have to defend themselves against an accusation.

But, for general writing, I'd agree that active voice is more, well, active.

 

very informative...we really need more posts like that one..

 

That's the first time I've seen anyone other than me argue that passive voice might be preferred under some circumstances. Right on!

For me, it was writing murder mysteries.

"Clearly, the victim has been stabbed... by a pickaxe!" (So the butler couldn't have done it, see?)

When it's the subject that matters, rather than the verb, you can amp it by putting it at the end of the sentence.

(But generally, active voice still rules.)

 

nice info dude

 

nice info dude