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Please check for grammar mistakes

Discussion in 'Copywriting' started by andrej, Mar 11, 2007.

  1. #1
    I'm working on my site TowerEiffel.com. Almost all the articles I have there are just copied whole from Wikipedia, so these must be OK. But I'm not sure if the texts I wrote are 100% gramatically correct, as English is not my native language.

    I would like you to check particularly these of my pages (that contain my own personal notes):

    towereiffel.com/submit_photos.html
    towereiffel.com/gallery.html
    towereiffel.com/links.html

    I think it's all OK, but just need to make sure before I kick off my site. Maybe some details can be found. I'll add to everyone's reputation who reviews this and will tell me what shall I change (if anything).

    Please reply only if you are a native English speaker.

    Thanks in advance.
     
    andrej, Mar 11, 2007 IP
  2. jmul7

    jmul7 Peon

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    #2
    I didn't check the wikipedia article, but on the submit photo page, this could be reworded:

    Please post original photos only that are not copyrighted. You must be the photographer and hold all rights to the photo to submit it.

    Submitting a photo is not a guarantee that it will be featured on the site. I'm quite selective as to the photos I will feature and will therefore reserve the right not to publish any photo submitted. However, I will reply to everyone who has sent me a photo, whether or not I select it.


    The links and gallery page don't show for me....
     
    jmul7, Mar 11, 2007 IP
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  3. andrej

    andrej Notable Member

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    #3
    Thank you jmul7 very much for that correction. I'll change it. Also, thank you for telling me my site doesn't work well. I'm going to change my host.

    Reputation added. ;)
     
    andrej, Mar 11, 2007 IP
  4. andrej

    andrej Notable Member

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    #4
    andrej, Mar 11, 2007 IP
  5. jmul7

    jmul7 Peon

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    #5
    jmul7, Mar 11, 2007 IP
  6. skyraider

    skyraider Peon

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    #6
    "If yes" should be "if so,"

    "if you have some good pics, feel free to e-mail me them" is grammatically incorrect and sounds unprofessional because of "pics" and "feel free". Try this:

    "Please check out our guidelines below:"

    This makes no sense. Try "The photos must be high-quality, unique, and interesting."

    "In order to submit the photo, you must [etc]"​

    Way too wordy. Try "I will notify you of the status of your submission via email."
     
    skyraider, Mar 11, 2007 IP
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  7. djazz

    djazz Active Member

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    #7
    On your Gallery page:

    I would suggest:

    [This page showcases some wonderful photos of the Eiffel Tower that I found on flickr.

    I absolutely love the Eiffel Tower. Isn't it amazing?]

    To say "my collection" implies that it is a personal collection that you have collected over time. Since you state in the next paragraph that you found them on flickr, it can't be both. :) (And btw, in English we look 'at' something, not 'on' it.)

    And to say, "I just love the Eiffel Tower, don't you too?" contains just a bit too much hype. You'd say it to a friend face-to-face, but it's a little amateurish for web copy.

    Since this is such a short piece of text, from a design point of view you might try making the text a bit bigger, maybe use h3 header text. Would be helpful from an SEO point of view also, since it's the only text with your keywords on the page (I noticed you're not using alt tags on your photos, you might consider this also for SEO purposes).

    And the short piece of text on your links page was just fine.

    For not being a native English speaker your writing is pretty darn good though, overall. I wish I could say I was as fluent in a second language!

    Deborah
     
    djazz, Mar 11, 2007 IP
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  8. andrej

    andrej Notable Member

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    #8
    Thank you very much for your little English lesson (reputation added). :)

    So, I've changed the articles. You can view it online and see it is 100% OK now.

    Skyrader, I decided to leave this one as it is, because I'd like to avoid receiving tons of Eiffel Tower photos and also want to emphasize that I'm selective as to the photos.

    Djazz, I added the alt tags to my photos and hope this will be good for SEO purposes.

    I've also made bigger the text on the Gallery page for SEO purposes. Do you think it will now be better for SEO? Because, to be honest, I like it more when it's written in small. However, if it is good for SEO, I will definitely leave it as it is.

    Jmul7, please tell me if you can access this pages now?:
    http://towereiffel.com/gallery.html
    http://towereiffel.com/links.html

    BTW, this is my 100th post. :)

    Andrej
     
    andrej, Mar 11, 2007 IP
  9. jmul7

    jmul7 Peon

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    #9
    Congrats on the 100 posts.

    I'd change the page title of the Photo Gallery page to: "TowerEiffel.com - Eiffel Tower Photo Gallery" instead of what you have there now.

    And you should change
    to "Want your photos featured on this page? Click here to be considered.

    Links page seems fine to me..
     
    jmul7, Mar 11, 2007 IP
  10. andrej

    andrej Notable Member

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    #10
    Gallery page changed. Thank you jmul7.
     
    andrej, Mar 11, 2007 IP
  11. djazz

    djazz Active Member

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    #11
    Your site is approaching sheer perfection now! :)

    To answer your question, yes, for SEO you want to give 'weight' to your keywords, and using a header tag (h1, h2, or h3) for the headlines on your page is a common way to do this. It's tiny, as is using alt tags with your keywords, but they DO all add up.

    Actually I like the slightly larger headline text on your gallery page - before, the text was the same size as your Adsense ads and so your eye wasn't immediately sure where to look first when you arrived at the page. It's better not to make your visitor 'think' about what they need to do when they're on your site, if that makes sense.

    Good luck!!
     
    djazz, Mar 11, 2007 IP