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Leaving my mentally ill friend..

Discussion in 'General Chat' started by shahab6, Oct 19, 2015.

  1. #1
    So I been friend with this mentally ill girl, but it has become to much for me, so I decided to cut her off. But for some reason I feel very bad about it, even through its the right thing for me to do as she does some very messed up things to me..
    Anyone had a crazy friend that they stop seeing?
    It's very sad stutution as when shes good, their very fun, caring person, and food friend.. But thrn out of no where they will do something very stupid.. No matter how many time iforgive them, they will alway do it again..
    I always thought they would get better, but that will never happened.. so I haven't talk to them for the last 3 weeks, but she still calls me..
    Also I feel bad about her stutution, but I know there's nothing I can do, so by leaving her, I don't have to worry about her..
     
    shahab6, Oct 19, 2015 IP
    bojan92 and mentat47 like this.
  2. Spoiltdiva

    Spoiltdiva Acclaimed Member

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    #2
    I understand your predicament but if she's mentally ill she may harm herself because you've left her. You cannot be held responsible for what someone else does, but if she were to do the unthinkable you would have much guilt. You ought to call her up on the phone just to check on how she is doing.
    Good luck to you with your situation.
     
    Spoiltdiva, Oct 19, 2015 IP
  3. dcristo

    dcristo Illustrious Member

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    #3
    You're exactly right. She has to want to help herself. If the relationship is toxic, it's time to move on.
     
    dcristo, Oct 19, 2015 IP
  4. shahab6

    shahab6 Well-Known Member

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    #4
    She hasn't done anything, so I doubt she would, as its been almost 20 days..
     
    shahab6, Oct 19, 2015 IP
  5. shahab6

    shahab6 Well-Known Member

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    #5
    Yes it's very toxic, my own loneliness, boredom, and feeling bad for her, has keep me being her friend.. But it's time for me to move on...
     
    shahab6, Oct 19, 2015 IP
  6. mentat47

    mentat47 Greenhorn

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    #6
    Leaving her is the best option, because you already try to help her. I don't know what kind of help did you offer with your 3 weeks conversations, but if you see that there is no progress, then you should leave.

    Let me give you one advice about ill people. They have problems with them self, so the best way that can do, is if they start to work on there self-improvement. Practicing prays and meditations is the best cure not for them, but for all humanity.
     
    mentat47, Oct 20, 2015 IP
  7. th.sigit

    th.sigit Well-Known Member

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    #7
    A friend will never leave a friend. If your friend is mentally ill and you would leave her for that reason, then you are not her friend at all. A friendship may fade due to time and distance, but an hour of catching all news together can fix that problem. Someone can say they will move on from a friendship, I simply disagree with it.
     
    th.sigit, Oct 20, 2015 IP
  8. shahab6

    shahab6 Well-Known Member

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    #8
    So if ur friend trys to poison u, u won't leave them?
     
    shahab6, Oct 20, 2015 IP
  9. shahab6

    shahab6 Well-Known Member

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    #9
    I'm not leaving her just because she's me tally ill, I'm leaving her because she has done to many fucked up things.
     
    shahab6, Oct 20, 2015 IP
    Atikur likes this.
  10. Vitarank

    Vitarank Well-Known Member

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    #10
    I understand how OP is feeling. We all are going to reach our breaking point. If she's mentally ill, why not persuade her family to turn her over to a medical institution and rehabilitate her?
     
    Vitarank, Oct 20, 2015 IP
  11. shahab6

    shahab6 Well-Known Member

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    #11
    Her parents have disown her...
     
    shahab6, Oct 20, 2015 IP
  12. th.sigit

    th.sigit Well-Known Member

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    #12
    Did she really try to poison you? If that is the case, you should report this crime to the police, or take her to a mental hospital. You can still be friends after. But if she did not poison you, there's no need even to use this word.
     
    th.sigit, Oct 20, 2015 IP
  13. shahab6

    shahab6 Well-Known Member

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    #13
    She claim she did, but then she said she was joking, so idk if she really did or not.. But I was just trying to make a point on how far would u go to stay with someone. But she has hit me few times, and she called the cops telling them I hit her.. The cops came and since they say me bleeding from my lip and head and saw no injury on her, they just told me to go home, and they told us to stay away from each other.
     
    shahab6, Oct 20, 2015 IP
  14. th.sigit

    th.sigit Well-Known Member

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    #14
    You were trying to justify what you are about to do. Seeking an advice for that is useless, because no one knows what is really going on. After all, she's not here to defend your judgement. If I were you, I would consult myself first, and if it didn't help, I would consult another friend of hers with the same situation like yours.
     
    th.sigit, Oct 20, 2015 IP
  15. shahab6

    shahab6 Well-Known Member

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    #15
    Your right, even through I made the right choice, idk why sometimes I feel so sad.
     
    shahab6, Oct 21, 2015 IP
  16. hogeyman3

    hogeyman3 Active Member

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    #16
    Friendships are hard.... :/
     
    hogeyman3, Oct 21, 2015 IP
  17. mentat47

    mentat47 Greenhorn

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    #17
    Really? She try to poison you and then she told you that she was joking? Then she hit you and after that she call the police... Omg, she definitely need a help! Hospital and special diagnose, because she is dangerous outside with people.
     
    mentat47, Oct 21, 2015 IP
  18. Spoiltdiva

    Spoiltdiva Acclaimed Member

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    #18
    You feel sad because deep down inside you know that she faces certain challenges and when her mental state is calm, she is probably good to you and herself. Am I correct in assuming this? If so then you also know that she has potential and you may feel that you were unable to extract this from her...not your fault.
     
    Spoiltdiva, Oct 21, 2015 IP
  19. shahab6

    shahab6 Well-Known Member

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    #19
    Yes u are correct when shes good she's good, and yes I always thought she can be better, I guess her not getting better I see that as a failure on my part..
     
    shahab6, Oct 21, 2015 IP
  20. zeeshan125

    zeeshan125 Member

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    #20
    Its really sad. She was your good friend in past. Now she is not ok. I think you should not leave her alone at this stage and have to find the solution because by leaving her u will not feel so good because you have a relation with her and you will not forget her even you try it.. The best way to overcome this situation is to be patience and find some way to make her normal like past. After doing this she never change then you can leave her..
     
    zeeshan125, Oct 28, 2015 IP