The teacher, brought a Venus statue in class and asks "What do you like best about it, class? Let's start with you, Robert. "The artwork," says Robert. "Very good. And you, Peter?" "Her chest!" says Peter. "Peter, get out! Go stand in the hall," responds the teacher with disgust. "And you, Johnny?" "I'm leaving, teacher, I'm leaving..."
A little old lady goes to the doctor and says : "Doctor I have this problem with gas, but it really doesn't bother me too much. My farts never smell and are always silent. As a matter of fact, I've farted at least 20 times since I've been here in your office. You didn't know I was farting because they don't smell and are silent. The doctor says, "I see, take these pills and come back to see me next week.'' The next week the lady comes back. "Doctor,"she says, "I don't know what the heck you gave me, but now my farts...although still silent...stink terribly." The doctor says, "Good !!! Now that we've cleared up your sinuses, let's work on your hearing."
An old man puts on his jacket, his wife askes him "whre are you going" "to the Dr. I'm goint to get me some viagra" he repplies, so the wife starts puting her jacket on and the husband askes her "where are you going going" she repplies "to the Dr. for a tetanus shot" "A tetanus shot"? askes the husband. The wife repplies "well, if you are going to poke me with that old rusty thing, I'll need a tetanus shot!
A man & a woman who never met before, find themselves on upper & lower berth of a long distance train. At 2 am, Man leans o ver saying,"Ma'm, sorry to bother you, Would you be kind enbough to give me a 2nd blanket from the side table. Its awfully cold. "I have a better idea",she replied,"Just for tonight, why don't we pretend that we are married !! "Great idea Madam.". He replied in excitement. She says,"Well then Get up & take it yourself."