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Sales Copy - Less Hype or More Honesty?

Discussion in 'Copywriting' started by AceWriter09, Aug 15, 2009.

  1. #1
    Everyone knows the standard copywriting formula. The attention grabbing headline: "Was Your Mother A Teenage Axe Murderer and you Only Found Out Yesterday? Get my My E-BOOK NOW to Help you Through This Crisis!" etc. and then the hype, and then the benefits and bullets and the inevitable:

    "Like you I was also POOR once. Did I say poor? That's an understatement. I was down and out, in the GUTTER and ready to slit my wrists. Then I discovered APEX DOG FLEA COLLARS and my life turned around within 24 HOURS!!! Now I'm a gazillionaire and drive a Ferarri and if you want to be a billionaire like me, get your Flea Collar today. Buy now and claw your way out of poverty and despair IMMEDIATELY!" (no pun intended :) )

    My point is this:

    Is the crazy hype really necessary? Aren't we underestimating the intelligence of the prospective buyer? Yes, this was a great way of "coercing" customers to buy products in the past, but hasn't the audience grown up and become more savvy and immune to cheap hype?

    Can't we cut the bull and try an honest approach instead? Why is it necessary to add the "poverty/failure" paragraph in just about every sales letter? Everytime I read a sales letter and get to the "Like you, I was poor once . . . " part I cringe.

    Also: "I am giving you this special offer not because I want to take your money and make millions off you, but because I really like you. "

    So what do you guys say? Isn't it time for sales copy to grow up and get real?
     
    AceWriter09, Aug 15, 2009 IP
  2. Y.L. Prinzel

    Y.L. Prinzel Peon

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    #2
    No. If it were time to get real, then women wouldn't stay with their abusive husbands, men wouldn't fall in love with the crazy suicidal chick, children would be raised properly, no one would have credit card debt and animals wouldn't be abused.

    Most people love the drama that acting badly brings into their lives. These same people want to get drama from your sales letter. Whether that drama is in the form of a miraculous savior, an amazing deal, or a bazillion-dollar generating secret.
     
    Y.L. Prinzel, Aug 15, 2009 IP
  3. Sneakyheathen

    Sneakyheathen Active Member

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    #3
    I have to agree. People are attracted to drama. That's why we have VH1, MTV, and Fox News. A predominantly negative headline will attract more visitors than a headline repping the cure for AIDS.

    I have to believe it's in human nature to seek out conflict. Immature or not, there's no reason not to market to the basic primate in all of us, yeah?

    There are definitely some "over-the-top" examples, but you can use dramatic headlines without turning your own mother into an ax murderer. :)
     
    Sneakyheathen, Aug 15, 2009 IP
  4. mariner7

    mariner7 Peon

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    #4
    You can use hype, insults, complete honesty -- whatever you want.

    None of that really matters as long as you have what they want and their desire for it is strong.

    I read a great letter that does this recently about sports betting. The guy has a picture of a winning ticket for $20,000 and a screen shot of the result on ESPN. All he needs after that is a buy now button.
     
    mariner7, Aug 15, 2009 IP
  5. AceWriter09

    AceWriter09 Well-Known Member

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    #5
    I like your train of thought Y.L., but I think I agree more with Sneakyheathen:

    I guess people have been using the miraculous, the unbelievable and the TRULY AMAZING to attract sales since time began. I'm thinking of the travelling carnivals of the 19th century where bearded ladies and other human "freaks" were put on display outside to attract, mesmerize, revulse and entice customers to buy a ticket and go inside to see more of the same. Would people fall for the same ploy today? Probably!

    So I guess crazy hype is here to stay :)
     
    AceWriter09, Aug 16, 2009 IP
  6. EMO_Ralez

    EMO_Ralez Peon

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    #6
    80% of the people buy on impulse or with emotion. You should read the 7 laws of persuasion an implant them too make your pages and content convert better
     
    EMO_Ralez, Aug 16, 2009 IP
  7. PhantomPrime

    PhantomPrime Peon

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    #7
    Sales and copywriting is true emotional manipulation at it's best. People don't NEED your product, but you make them FEEL like they do. How many purchases in your life do you regret the next day?

    Using the hype and ridiculous story method may seem overdone, but it works
     
    PhantomPrime, Aug 16, 2009 IP
  8. cd928

    cd928 Peon

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    #8
    The "poverty" paragraph is there for a reason, especially if you're selling "moneymaking" products. The people who would be interested in buying this type of product are those are afraid of becoming poor, those who want to make more money -- and have an easy way to do those things.

    What I'm saying is that it has its use. It strikes a chord with its prospects. And that's what you want to do if you want to sell your product.

    The same goes in the health and fitness niche. There's the usual line, "I used to be fat, but when I did my research on effective fitness methods, I finally hit paydirt. Now I'm leaner and have washboard abs. I already did the hard work for you, so you can get the body that you want in less time!" They use that because it works.

    That's me being pragmatic about it. And a lot of marketers use it because, well, it works.

    But from an ethical standpoint, all I'll say is that never make claims you can never back up. If indeed you were poor, and if indeed you acquired the knowledge you're selling to get you out of poverty, then by all means use it. If it inspires people to think that like you, they can live better lives, then I don't see anything wrong with that. Otherwise, just be straight honest, or don't sell your product at all.

    My 2 cents. :)
     
    cd928, Aug 16, 2009 IP
  9. KsNitro

    KsNitro Greenhorn

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    #9
    The standard copywriting formula (appealing to emotions) has been going on for a very long time. Look at direct mail ads that predate the Internet. Or furniture catalogs from 100 years ago. You can keep going back and the same formula hasn't changed because certain things about people don't change. And you may be surprised at how some of these over the top ads convert.
     
    Last edited: Aug 24, 2009
    KsNitro, Aug 24, 2009 IP
  10. lbrg

    lbrg Peon

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    #10
    as much as i dislike hyped copy, everything that the previous posters have said about it is absolutely true. especially with "moneymaking" products.

    honesty works best when you've got a product with a good deal of value and support behind it. if you're being honnest about a work from home product, good luck selling it.
     
    lbrg, Aug 24, 2009 IP
  11. AceWriter09

    AceWriter09 Well-Known Member

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    #11
    Yes, but that's exactly my point. A 100 years ago people were more gullible and naive. Most of them were illiterate and would believe almost any spectacular claim made by a shrewd salesman, for example, selling "miracle" cures that could heal the blind, raise the dead etc. If you look at movies from the 1960s, 70s, and 80s, you realize that people were still pretty naive and willing to believe almost anything - as long as it was in print, or came from TV - or from the mouth of a politician. People had a kind of sweet innocence that could be exploited or preyed upon by unscrupulous vendors.

    But today everyone knows you can't believe anything in print, or especially what politicians say etc. We've all been scammed and lied to just too often. Now you have to try and use your radar to sift through all the bull out there to try get to the truth. In this day and age, we've all grown up and become rather cynical - saturated by graphic movies, TV shows, pretty much uncensored printed media - and the Internet - who in their right mind can still honestly believe the hyped emotional "triggers" that worked so well 20, 50 or a hundred years ago? Maybe that's why so many prospects click away so quickly.
     
    AceWriter09, Aug 25, 2009 IP
  12. Suki

    Suki Greenhorn

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    #12
    My take on this would be - read the target audience.

    For example, advertisements for fairness creams(yes there IS such a thing and it's widely marketed) in India cater to people who are still backward enough to value fair skin as an asset. Here, a blatant association of fair skin with finesse, confidence, education and social climbing is very effective. (Let's leave aside the fact that those creams really don't work.)

    On the other hand, sales copy for any specialized business tool will fall flat on its face if it makes such tall claims. In these cases, information has to be accurate, wording has to be precise, and headlines like "The New XYZ Billing Software will Take Over The World!" won't really work. The target clientele for such items is assumed to have a higher intelligence level, more specific needs, and therefore be less susceptible to blatant appeals to the emotion. This doesn't mean that these professionals are immune to emotional manipulation, it's just that the copywriter will have to be more subtle in promoting the product and pimping its virtues.
     
    Suki, Aug 25, 2009 IP
  13. the writer

    the writer Active Member

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    #13
    Unfortunately, the over the top stuff sells, and it's memorable. We have a local car guy who gets on TV and makes these ridiculous commercials. Yet, his one word catch phrase, "Huge", makes him memorable, and he's been the number one car dealer in town for over 20 years because of it. Many people are hard pressed to think of the name of another dealer in town, and we have a lot of them.

    I've questioned the long sales letter myself. I tend to read the first paragraph or two, then skip to the end to see what the price is. But most other people obviously need the build up and the testimonials. It's always said if it didn't work, people would stop doing it. There must be something to that.
     
    the writer, Aug 25, 2009 IP
  14. latoya

    latoya Active Member

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    #14
    Your approach depends on your audience. There are some audiences where you must cut straight to the chase and some audiences that won't buy unless there's some hype.
     
    latoya, Aug 25, 2009 IP
  15. AC-Coach

    AC-Coach Peon

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    #15
    I totally agree with latoya. Base your campaign on the research you should have done on your product and target market. I will say this though. I've tried both methods extensively for promotion and in my experience a more down to earth, informational approach has always worked the best. I'm a firm believer in the fact that if you have a quality product, and stand behind it with strong support, the reputation you build will help sales flourish.

    This has been my experience anyway.

    Nothing turns me off more as a buyer than over-hyping.
     
    AC-Coach, Aug 25, 2009 IP
  16. lostpoet

    lostpoet Well-Known Member

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    #16
    Whenever I see a long sales page, the first thing that comes to my mind is, "here comes another scam".

    However, get rich/slim/beautiful/healthy/cured quick people are desperate yet paranoid enough to need such elaborate setups. So I guess it works there.

    I would say that the people talking about the different approach for different people are on the right track. Because when you have a boring software and a few screenshots to sell to seasoned businessmen, you cannot afford to go in to all that banter about your past, present and future. You have to hit the spots with poinpoint accuracy and split-second timing. Hence, extensive background research followed by precise copy will save the day when you clientele is more sophisticated. That's what I think anyway.

    That said, "GET MY E-Book ON HOW I MADE $32628561876 IN MY SLEEP! <sleeping pills and hallucinogens not included>"
     
    lostpoet, Aug 26, 2009 IP
  17. cd928

    cd928 Peon

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    #17
    cd928, Aug 26, 2009 IP
  18. AceWriter09

    AceWriter09 Well-Known Member

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    #18
    Hey, Lost - I think you have a winner on your hands! I'm completely sold! :) Where do I get my copy and how much do you charge? Only $999? - what a bargain! But I think you'll treble your sales if you add a free bonus - eg a month's supply of sleeping pills. Everyone knows the freebies increase sales. :)
     
    AceWriter09, Aug 27, 2009 IP
  19. jazmi00

    jazmi00 Peon

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    #19
    As a buyer, I prefer honesty. I can see straight through the hype, and it's a clear sign NOT to buy. If you've got to hype up your product, then it's probably not what you say it is and I don't want to be disappointed. Considering the state of the economy, people pay a little more attention and tend to take a second to think before buying now. But, you still have to consider your target audience...try to fill their shoes when writing your copy.
     
    jazmi00, Aug 27, 2009 IP
  20. lostpoet

    lostpoet Well-Known Member

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    #20
    @AceWriter - ;) Yeah, I think I will hook my buyers up with a previously unknown miracle drug!

    @Jazmi00 - Buyers like you make up a tiny fraction of the entire force and yes, they buy no BS.
     
    lostpoet, Aug 27, 2009 IP