One day one joke or sms ...

Discussion in 'Movies, Music & TV' started by Lalit_Burma, Nov 18, 2008.

  1. #1
    Here is today's one -

    Mobile phones are the only things in live of which men talk about having the smallest.
     
    Lalit_Burma, Nov 18, 2008 IP
  2. Kim-Webgirl

    Kim-Webgirl Peon

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    #2
    That is so true!!!
     
    Kim-Webgirl, Nov 18, 2008 IP
  3. Lalit_Burma

    Lalit_Burma Active Member

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    #3
    Here is another one liner for SMS -

    Guys are like coffee… the best ones are rich, warm, and can keep you up all night long.
     
    Lalit_Burma, Nov 19, 2008 IP
  4. phd

    phd Active Member

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    #4
    "Where should one use perfume?"
    a young woman asked.
    "Wherever one wants to be kissed,"
    I said.
     
    phd, Nov 19, 2008 IP
  5. victorqd

    victorqd Well-Known Member

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    #5
    Clouds r white but the sky is blue,monkey like u should b kept in the zoo, dont get
    angry ull find me there too,not in the cage but laughing at u. :)
     
    victorqd, Nov 19, 2008 IP
  6. Lalit_Burma

    Lalit_Burma Active Member

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    #6
    A beautiful young woman gets out of the shower, wraps a towel around her and tells her husband that he can get in the shower. As he enters the shower, the doorbell rings.

    The wife says she’ll get the door and goes downstairs.

    When she opens the door, she sees her neighbour, Bill, whose mouth opens wide at the sight of her shimmering form.

    He pulls out two one hundred dollar bills and tells her that they are hers if she will just let the towel fall to her waist.

    She thinks why not and drops the towel down and takes the money.

    Bill gasps at the sight and shows her two more hundreds and offers them if she will just let the towel go altogether.

    She thinks she has come this far so what the heck and drops the towel to the ground.

    Bill looks for a minute, thanks her and leaves.

    When she got back upstairs, her husband had completed his shower and asks her who was at the door. She says just Bill.

    The husband replies, “Did he say anything about the $400 he owes me?”
     
    Lalit_Burma, Nov 21, 2008 IP
  7. drjupitor

    drjupitor Banned

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    #7
    Good sms joke friend.
    I will always ask her to use perfume where she wants to be kissed.
     
    drjupitor, Nov 23, 2008 IP
  8. Lalit_Burma

    Lalit_Burma Active Member

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    #8
    One Guy : what is the example of true bravery?

    Second Guy : when you are suffering from serious loose motions and still take a chance to fart
     
    Lalit_Burma, Nov 24, 2008 IP
  9. Lalit_Burma

    Lalit_Burma Active Member

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    #9
    All people in this world
    Be it Indians or English
    Be it American or Australian
    Be it Chinese or Pakistanis
    Atleast once a day
    Stand on single leg for
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    Changing underwear!
     
    Lalit_Burma, Nov 25, 2008 IP
  10. Lalit_Burma

    Lalit_Burma Active Member

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    #10
    Can you lend me Please Rs 2000 ?
    I really need it. Please help me out,
    I know you have it, i wil return it.

    santa asks to ATM machine ?
     
    Lalit_Burma, Nov 26, 2008 IP
  11. sachamps

    sachamps Peon

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    #11
    This one was circulating during our little electricity crisis earlier this year - I think any South African's will identify :p

    There is good news and bad news from ESKOM:
    Bad news: The s#$t's going to hit the fan.
    Good news: The fan's not working!!
     
    sachamps, Nov 26, 2008 IP
  12. Lalit_Burma

    Lalit_Burma Active Member

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    #12
    A Professor at one of the IIMs was explaining marketing concepts to the IIM Students:

    1. You see a beautiful babe at a party. You go up to
    her and say: “I am very rich. “Marry me!” - That’s Direct Marketing”

    2. You are at a party with your friends and see a
    beautiful babe. One of your friends goes up to her and
    pointing at you says: “He’s very rich.
    “Marry him.” -That’s Advertising”

    3. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to
    her and get her telephone number. The next day, you
    call and say: “Hi, I’m very rich.
    “Marry me - That’s Telemarketing”
     
    Lalit_Burma, Nov 27, 2008 IP
  13. Lalit_Burma

    Lalit_Burma Active Member

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    #13
    Managment professor define Marketing skill -

    4. You're at a party and see gorgeous girl. You get up
    and straighten your tie, you walk up to her and pour
    her a drink, you open the door (of the car)for her,
    pick up her bag after she drops it, offer her ride and
    then say:"By the way, I'm rich. Will you
    "Marry Me?"
    - That's Public Relations"

    5. You're at a party and see gorgeous girl. She walks
    up to you and says:"You are very rich!
    "Can you marry ! me?"
    - That's Brand Recognition"

    6. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to
    her and say: "I am very rich. Marry me!" She gives you
    a nice hard slap on your face. -
    - "That's Customer Feedback"
     
    Lalit_Burma, Dec 1, 2008 IP
  14. Lalit_Burma

    Lalit_Burma Active Member

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    #14
    ********************

    Having one child makes you a parent; having two you are a referee.

    ********************

    Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and the other is the husband!

    ********************

    Wife: Darling today is our anniversary, what should we do?
    Husband: Let us stand in silence for 2 minutes.

    ********************

    It's funny when people discuss Love Marriage vs Arranged. It's like asking someone, if suicide is better or being murdered.

    ********************

    There is only one perfect wife in the world and every neighbor has it!

    ********************
     
    Lalit_Burma, Dec 2, 2008 IP
  15. justinlorder

    justinlorder Peon

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    #15
    This is one of most funny sms I have ever read .
    If there are more such funny sms, I am willing to buy the database .
     
    justinlorder, Dec 4, 2008 IP