http://building-muscle-review.blogspot.com/ im going to give bum marketing a go. if someone could review my site and tell me if its ok.
it looks a little generic. your affiliate link on the right at the top looks out of place and I dont really like tinyurl. I mean a lot of people use it to cloak their affiliate links but to me it just looks like your hiding something but then again that just might be because i know you actually are lol but to each his own. I think you should shorten the content and make a list of some sort to summarize ALL that content into very key points. if I landed on your page I probably would click off immediately because it looks like its not legit.
its ok, i woudl consider doing a real review of a few different muscle buldiing products. Don't give them all good ratiings, have a table w/ reviews, short bullet points next to each product at the top and then more detailed reviews down below. This gives the user the option of going directly to make the purchase or continueing to read a review in more detail below.
You are not trying to create a sales page. Reviews are usually quite short, but yours is long. Add some more pictures and format the text (colors, sizes, etc)
First paragraph... Why is in quotes? Why is "First" capitalized? Lower case "i"? "unattractive" is one word. Why is "To" capitalized? Reading further down the page... You need to swear? You willing to lose a customer over that? Why should I trust you? I have to read through all of that before I can click through? Just honest feedback here. I think it needs some work.