Lol mate- thats a job possible by SEOs and unfortunately I am not one of them. But as far as I understand-- There are 2 ways to get traffic-- Referral - you advertise on many other websites- and visitors of those sites visit you. Quite costly - but if you are selling something- its quite benefitting if you can choose the correct sites you advertise. Then there is the organic traffic - You rank very high on search engines for very popular terms in your niche and normal searchers visit your sites. Both kinds of traffic are highly targetted & convertible as only those interested in your product will visit you. This can be achieved through proper SEO & Viral marketing. Mate- nothing comes cheap. If you wanna get something- you will have to pay something.
i have related category in my dir. you can submit to my highly promoted directory (link in my sig.) in both regular as well as featured listings. featured listing appear on home page as well top category pages. remember my dir. is not free.
I want to get free/paid dirs, I think you should browse this forum carefully. There are the huge lists in this forum, with all categories
I just submit to my niche directories by doing a Google research. In my opinion it is the best way of getting good quality links