Amen Brother. Yeah, it's quite a bit, not near that, but for my age quite a bit. Also have student loans that are pressing (not harrassing) me now too.
Dude... I'm having a hard time not saying what I want to, but I did pay my bills religiously until I woke up out of a Grand Mal Seizure from Klonopin withdrawal because I couldn't get a doctor to prescribe it to me when I moved there, and couldn't get the ER to believe I was about to have a seizure. My 6 stitches + constant Migraines/Anxiety/Visuals of how my head slammed into the tile floor while I was making weird noises and seizing make it + the fact that no lawyer thinks it is their fault, makes me have a lot of anger. All they had to do was believe me and give me a quick benzo injection, but they stuck me in a back room with no one to watch me and found me later on the floor in a pool of blood and had to give me oxegen, etc. to bring me back. I think I'm doing a pretty good job of being responsible and not hating them for it or trying to get revenge (doesn't solve anything for me). So I guess you can kiss my ass too if you want. Now, to bring this back to why this is related to me not being able to pay my bills; It brought out anxieties that I thought I had beaten years ago, and any time I get a little dizzy or hungry I start to wonder if I'm going to wake up in Heaven and leave my loved ones all alone. Any time I have gone to an ER after that I get really freaked out and start demanding that they watch me. As a human, I still naturally get a little scared of death even though I know it will be bliss. Weird how our spirit is tied to our flesh. They both affect the other, and you have to protect them both. I'm getting ot again now so I'm done. I just can't concentrate on anything long enough to make it prosper now.