Q: What's the difference between the Buffalo Bills and a dollar bill? A: You can still get four quarters out of a dollar.
im not sure about jokes actually, everytimes im meeting a new friend from online chatting they keep smiling to me like something at my face. They said im very jokes person, even my best friend agree with that. The main jokes is, that im really a joker or what? Even during im serious all my friend will laugh to me and said " stop pretending like that". Gosh, im totally got to change my face.
I didn't make that joke up man..... Its been around for like 10000 years .... "answers on a post card" Is that a UK thing? Whats does that mean? ...............
It is a UK thing. I shall interpret for the benefit of the US audience - "suggestions from the floor."
Your right, You are way more intelligent, Cause I still have no idea what that means. Anyhow - Fine a nicer and less offensive joke Q: Why did the duck cross the road? A: To get to the other side. Old , I know, But still a classic and less offensive BUT a tad bit corny
It's a chicken, isn't it mate? Alright, here's one ==> any blondes on here, please don't kill me A blonde goes into a nearby store and asks a clerk if she can buy the TV in the corner. The clerk looks at her and says that he doesn't serve blondes, so she goes back home and dyes her hair black. The next day she returns to the store and asks the same thing, and again, the clerk said he doesn't serve blondes. Frustrated, the blonde goes home and dyes her hair yet again, to a shade of red. Sure that a clerk would sell her the TV this time, she returns and asks a different clerk this time. To her astonishment, this clerk also says that she doesn't serve blondes. The blonde asks the clerk, "How in the world do you know I am a blonde?" The clerk looks at her disgustedly and says,"That's not a TV -- it's a microwave!"
Well, I suppose blonde jokes are slightly safer than those about terminal illness. That being the case, here's my contribution: Q: What do you call a blonde with more than one brain cell? A: Pregnant! I'll just get my coat.
No don't go all cry baby on that. Jokes can be a bit blunt, nothing wrong with that. Ever heard of the famous "The Aristocrats" joke? You should go and see the movie/documentary on that, that will mess you up for good
A kid in bus sitting behind driver starts saying, "If my dad was a bull & my mom a cow I'd be a little bull". Driver got mad at noisy kid. Kid continues, "If my dad was an elephant & mom a girl elephant I would be a little elephant". Kid goes on & on with many animal names when driver gets angry & says," What if you dad was gay and mom was a prostitute?" Kid smiles & says, "I would be a Bus Driver"
What do you call a sheep with no legs? A cloud. (Jon) == Doctor! I have a serious problem, I can never remember what i just said. When did you first notice this problem? What problem? (Scott) == What is defference between man and Superman? Man wears underwear under the trouser and superman wears it over the trouser. (Tejas Chachcha) == How do you know if your a red neck? You go to the family reunon to find a date! (Faithe Ainsworth) == Yo mamma so stupid, she tried to commit suicide by jumping out her basement window. (Kyle Burglie) Yo mamma so fat, every time she turns around its her b-day!!! (Pisshead Bonehead) == Sam: Would you punish me for some thing i didn't do? Teacher: no, of course not. Sam: good, because i didn't do my homework. (Scott) == What is green and smells? Hulk's fart. (Azbar Kahleed) tell me if you want more
Here is two other Jokes Your mama's so fat when she jumps, she gets stuck Your Mama's so hairy it looks like she has Don King in a head lock Hope you like those
Amazing Anagrams Dormitory == Dirty Room Desperation == A Rope Ends It The Morse Code == Here Come Dots Slot Machines == Cash Lost in 'em Animosity == Is No Amity Snooze Alarms == Alas! No More Z's Alec Guinness == Genuine Class Semolina == Is No Meal The Public Art Galleries == Large Picture Halls, I Bet A Decimal Point == I'm a Dot in Place The Earthquakes == That Queer Shake Eleven plus two == Twelve plus one Contradiction == Accord not in it This one's amazing: [From Hamlet by Shakespeare] To be or not to be: that is the question, whether tis nobler in the mind to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune. Becomes: In one of the Bard's best-thought-of tragedies, our insistent hero, Hamlet, queries on two fronts about how life turns rotten. And the grand finale: "That's one small step for a man, one giant leap for mankind." -- Neil A. Armstrong becomes: A thin man ran; makes a large stride; left planet, pins flag on moon! On to Mars!