I was wondering what your opinion is on why people are teased most of the time instead of being told kindly what's wrong, then having a chance to change. Is it from the person's own insecurities, or is it a good way to teach somebody a lesson? Personally it makes me sad whenever I see it or receive it. Been different all my life. I think it makes people more defensive.
I agree, though I think it's part of human nature, and is an instinctive response. I derive my theory from Claude Levi-Strauss's views on laughter (I think it was - too many years ago, now) - why slapstick comedy? Why laugh when someone falls? It's society's way of nudging the "out of place" person back into the fold - we can't all be falling and breaking our legs, or else we'd endanger the entire gene pool. Teasing and laughter serve to "gently" preserve the gene pool. That's the theory, anyway. As I remember it, but there have been a few miles since then.
I've done both, so by no means perfect, but i think I started realizing in junior high that teasing only had a negative impact. To "gently" help someone, shouldn't you be upfront with them, and not make them feel like they are being made fun of for other reasons? Only serves to confuse them when they aren't sure why. And most teasing is pretty passive-aggressive. NOW, when some people agree to a debate, then it's open season right? But outside of that agreement, it seems like abuse. Just my opinion.
we live in a cannabilistic world so that's to be expected. people are becoming too soft, they're like marshmallows. and ppl who used to get beat by their dad go out and try to inflict the same pain on society. the people who tease to tear ppl down are generally weak people inside, so you get up in their face and see how they like it. and if they keep going then you knock some heads and show'em you don't play like that. pretty soon you'll find out ppl stop teasing with you and you can diffuse situations with a hard look. now it's different if it's a friend or someone who's just playing. but if you don't like it then sh!t why not let'em know? if you give some people an inch, they'll go a mile. marshmallow people won't last long in todays society, i don't know when they ever have..
Oh, I agree, SolutionX. As both the brunt and the point man, growing up, there are things I remain ashamed of to this day. I'm only saying I think it's deeply imbedded in human nature; an instinctive response to stimuli, not a refined choice. To curb it, it has to be unlearned, I'd say.
Yeah, I agree. I never really knew why I teased anyone in school, or got teased, just did it kind of blindly. Just hope people who are teased remember that everything works together for good if you just have a little faith. This world will be gone some day and all this stuff will seem insignificant. So just ignore it and have fun for now.
It depends on how it is done. There are some angry people in this world that just enjoy being mean. They are usually insecure and try to build themselves up by trying to make others look bad. I knew this lady at work that would say really awful things, then say oh I'm just kidding. They fired her one day and no one was really sad to see her go. Some people though will tease you because they like you. Usually that kind of teasing is fun for the teased and the teaser.
People who tease generally come in crowds, and hound a lone person like a pack of wolves. These are dumb cowards, who have psychological problems. My opinion is to stay in groups, then these weak people won't be able to pick you up. There is always a sense of protection and security when you are in a group of friends.
that's very true for most people. however i feel more comfortable when i'm alone. idk why but i actually want ppl to mess with me when i'm alone and look like easy prey, cause they think they're stronger in numbers but no that is not the case. there is usually one talker who is all talk and the rest are laughing hyenas.. if they push you, you push back twice as hard and if they think they're gonna hit you first you prove'em wrong. hit'em in the throat then mercilessly beat them, those other hyenas won't touch you. and when you're done and brush the scum off your hands, you have built yourself a reputation.. to not be messed with. first off people who usually fall victim need to learn how to fight. then they gotta get that eye of the tiger. (preferrably run on the beach with appollo) but seriously people gotta learn how to build themselves reputations, make fun out of what would be an otherwise scary, dangerous situation. it's better to get beat up standing for what you believe in than take it like a hoe.
I really like your attitude... Thats what I call TOUGH GUY. Good. I really liked the last line. You've just earned some Respect...
I usually got in one fight every year at school. At the beginning of the year someone would invariably try to "test" me. I would get up in the middle of class if necessary and beat them senseless. I would be honest to the principal and say what happened and take my punishment with a smile. I usually "won" these fights on pure surprise and brutality alone. They where sometimes bigger or stronger but I found if I just walked over and started throwing punches they never had a chance. Having an older brother who taught me the temporal nature of pain helped too Now that I am older and live in a litigation society I would probably just let them hit me and sue if it came to fisticuffs (love that word) but for mere teasing I usually have a snappy come back or a momma joke that can shut anyone up.
I usually found slicing their nuts off helped. Or, asking very politely, "pardon me, but may I introduce you to the pavement?"
lol gauharjk, i wasnt sure if you were being sarcastic or not so i'll take it as a compliment. im not a tough guy at all, i just like crippling the "big bad bully". earthfraze, atleast you can keep your temper, that's really the better thing to do lol
Haha, I didn't expect such a response, but I find a lot of wisdom in these posts. Bullies are the easiest to take down. If they're in a pack, take out the leader by kicking him you know where haha. Then his gang will leave him and probably start following you . Plus the ladies... hehe. This forum has been a fascinating adventure for me as someone with extreme social anxieties all my life. The only way I've survived is by creating a very strong defense and only use it when I'm attacked. Sometimes I try to draw people out who would attack such a person, just to show them that they won't always get somebody to cry or break... might get punched instead lol. But please... violence is not the answer. Maybe a little shove or quick witted joke is better. I dunno. All these problems teens are having today and lashing out... I JUST WISH I COULD HELP YOU I WAS THERE. You can flip anything around to your advantage if you apply your mind or have faith. Karate is also a great way to get people off your back. I know a "_?_" degree black belt, and his really nice daughter stopped getting teased the moment everyone realized who's daughter she was.
Insecure people project their insecurities outwards, which is where bullying comes from. It's really that simple.
I hope my post was understood for what it was, satire. I agree that violence is never the answer, unless it is necessary to defend oneself or another innocent. I have only needed to resort to this last option when all else was exhausted, or an emergency dictated the appropriate response.
lol while i agree with northpoint, violence isn't good.. sometimes you have to be violent if you wanna be left alone. some people never understand, not through words or anything else so you have to beat it in. of course you only do that when they're "bullying" you or have an unreasonable beef with you. wanna stop bullying? that's how you do it. you wanna stop school shootings? that's how you do it. i always stood up for the pudgy kids that got picked on cause i know that's not right and i think anyone with respect should do the same. most people just walk along like it never happens.. then the next thing you know the kid brings a gun into school. so yes sometimes violence is the answer, the lesser form of violence that is. beating the bullies into submission, it's not like you're killing anyone. real fist fighting isn't bad, and unless you're a crazy man you likely won't kill anyone from it. it actually can make a better man out of you. it would be a much safer world if people with two beefs could go out back and have a good fistfight over it, then when it's all over, shake each others hand and go on with the day. ever watch a real fight? usually when it's over, both people shake each others hand out of instinct. because it's all about respect. that's much healthier than holding in hateful feelings and one day killing someone over it. the world would be a much safer place if everyone could do this, but instead we view fist fighting as "hateful violence".
Just to be clear. My view of violence comes from training. It isn't a philosophy, except as it has come through physical training, and as such only the instance can tell anyone what to do. I teach a martial art and tactical defense, and this is my prevailing view. The few times it has been really unavoidable, I have unleashed as needs be, and there wasn't any handshaking after. There was either a guy who understood there is no "out," and all was well, or a guy severely busted up on the ground and myself standing over him, apprehending him for later arrest. The last time was a guy who tried to force his way into my car, with my wife in it, while she waited for me to close our restaurant. As I came down the alleyway to our car, he was trying to gain entry, she could not exit the car, and this placed her in immediate danger. I rushed down the alley, took him down and gave him the opportunity to relent; he didn't, and got more belligerent. I broke his arm and severely fractured his face. He was arrested and taken away. His father called the police department in complaint and was told by the cop that his little darling was lucky I didn't kill him; that as my wife was in immediate danger I had every right to use any means at my behest, and he was right. I don't take violence lightly. It isn't a game of bravado or proven prowess. Without going too much into it, my hope is that training provides an instinctive, and proper, response as necessary. Best story in this respect comes from a Romanian friend of mine, 20+ years ago. He trained in Kyokushin, under Masatatsu Oyama Shihan. Master Oyama had paid a visit to Romania, to teach his students there. The sight of this rather humble-looking asian in Romania apparently drew a crowd of taunters to mercilessly tease him and his wife. From what my friend told me, Oyama Shihan just bowed and smiled, repeatedly...and all the while these punks didn't realize this is a man capable of killing all of them, without breaking a sweat. Do not act at all until no other choice is available. Then do not hesitate at all to act with the totality of your being. This is my guiding principle.