I am working on this salesletter and am probably going to increase price. Any thoughts on its persuasiveness? It's a Dreamweaver training product for marketers (some good stuff for copywriters too!) Anyways...let me know. http://www.dreamweaverexposed.com
thought the general writing was to a good standard. my only problem was its a little chunky and should concentrate more on the benefits and space them out a little bit - easier on the eye. the only other thing is at the end if i wasnt nervous in ordering i am now! the guarantees although need to be stressed make me wobble a little bit like the clickbank stuff i would take it out your prospect doesnt need to know IMO. all a all a good letter with a few tweaks will do well. Kind Regards Stephen Doyle ccuk-ltd.com Killer Copy Writing Super Human Sales Training Direct Marketing
Frankly speaking these long sales letters are not my cup of tea. In case you want to find out why people don't like them in general this resource would be very helpful. http://www.successdoctor.com/books/deathofthesalesletter.pdf
It is very "in your face." I agree with Stephen there. It does need a little bit of spacing in it. I think you may have over-done the brightness of it a bit. Look at other letters for examples. Nightcrawler's link helps, that way you know perhaps, what you might trim down on, in order to make it more palatable.
I am opting for direct response style site...but maybe I will tone a few things down and add some more graphical representations of the content to make it easier to read and grasp.
The writing style seems very aggressive, you mention in your sales letter this is deliberate because you want buyers to have this opportunity, but by the end reading I wasn't sold on the product. Where you mention your price, I think the step downs from $97 to $47 could involve more explanation. That sentence finishes too quickly and the explanation afterward doesn't really get my trust. On an unrelated matter, using Firefox, all of your links overlap the preceding text by several pixels.
Thanks for the feedback. what do you mean "On an unrelated matter, using Firefox, all of your links overlap the preceding text by several pixels."??? I am using Firefox 2.007 and it looks fine...am I missing something? AHHH! Did you try hitting refresh? maybe it was a screen misload or something. pls let me know.
Speaking from a standpoint of statistically profitable sales letters: Using red fonts are not profitable PS's are not profitable Guarantee's are profitable (I don't see one) Shorter (about 1.8 printed pages) is profitable Now that said there is one right answer and it's not mine... every sales page varies to some extent. Go get a testing tool like MuVar ($$) or the free split tester at http://www.freesplittest.com/ and start testing the variables on your sales page, otherwise your leaving money on the table.
thanks. I think you maybe right about the red headline...I just looked at websites of 5 top name copywriters and saw they had blue headlines! Suprised I overlooked that...will change it. you really think P.S.'s are no good? I've hear people read headline and P.S. first if they decide to scan through the entire letter. BTW: the site in your sig file uses an ugly green headline...why aren't you using blue?
If you look at ads that are profitable and compare them with ones that are not profitable... PS's and red headlines are not profitable. I have an ugly green headline (that you saw) because that sales page is under test. Again, there is a right answer and you won't know it until you test your ad copy for that product.
Yep it's too agressive, try to be more user-friendly lol.. Also i think red headlines are profitable! It takes the attention of the users!
I think the other posters are right about using red headlines. It may have worked back when Web copy was a novel thing, but people have become desensitized to this type of text. I know if I see a red headline, I groan and think about the sales pitch to come.
thanks for all of have commented! I am making revisions and will have a revised sales letter shortly. Hopefully all the people who have commented will take a second look and let me know if they think it has improved. I'll post again when the next version is ready.
Have to agree. Your explanation for reducing price seemed a little disingenuous. Actually turned me off the product some. Overall I personally liked the salesletter, though I seldom read them top to bottom, you did hold my attention.
thanks for the feedback tellis and thanks to others. I think your comments have helped a lot. I've fixed it and posted the revisions at dreamweaverexposed.com if you have a chance, let me know what you think