A little boy wanted $100.00 very badly and prayed for weeks, but nothing happened. Then he decided to write God a letter requesting the $100.00. When the postal authorities received the letter to God , USA , they decided to send it to the President. The president was so amused that he instructed his secretary to send the little boy a $5.00 bill. The president thought this would appear to be a lot of money to a little boy. The little boy was delighted with the $5.00 bill and sat down to write a thank-you note to God, which read: Dear God: Thank you very much for sending the money. However, I noticed that for some reason you sent it through Washington , DC , and those assholes deducted $95.00 in taxes. to see previous joke of the day visit: LAPD, CIA, FBI are trying to prove to the president who can catch criminals faster
Nice one, Heard a story like this when I was in school " A letter to God" but still good. I have one for sharing........ A young couple wanted to join the church, the pastor told them,"We have a special requirement for new member couples". "You must abstain for one whole month." The couple agreed, but after three weeks they returned to the Church. When the Pastor ushered them into his office, the wife was crying and the husband was obviously very depressed. "You are back so soon... Is there a problem?" the pastor inquired. "We are terribly ashamed to admit that we did not manage to abstain for the required month." the young man replied sadly. The pastor asked him what happened. "Well, the first week was difficult... However, we managed to abstain through sheer willpower. The second week was terrible,but with the use of prayer, we managed to abstain. However, the third week was unbearable. We tried cold showers, prayer, reading from the Bible...anything to keep our minds off carnal thoughts. "One afternoon my wife reached for a can of paint and dropped it. When she bent over to pick it up, I was overcome with lust and I just had my way with her right then and there. It was lustful, loud, passionate sex. It lasted for over an hour and when we were done we were both drenched in sweat." admitted the man, shamefacedly. The pastor lowered his head and said sternly, "You understand this means you will not be welcome in our church." "We know." said the young man, hanging his head, "We're not welcome at Home Depot either."
LOL! nice ones. here's one I found in the net. A woman accompanied her husband to the doctor's office. After his checkup, the doctor called the wife into his office alone. He said, "Your husband is suffering from a very severe disease, combined with horrible stress. If you don't do the following, your husband will surely die. Each morning, fix him a healthy breakfast. Be pleasant, and make sure he is in a good mood. For lunch make him a nutritious meal. For dinner prepare an specially nice meal for him. Don't burden him with chores, as he probably had a hard day. Don't discuss your problems with him, it will only make his stress worse. And most importantly, make love with your husband several times a week and satisfy his every whim. If you can do this for the next 10 months to a year, I think your husband will regain his health completely." On the way home, the husband asked his wife. "What did the doctor say?" She replied: "He said you're going to die ..."
Lol...i love the first 2 jokes...i was really in a bad mood but those jokes made my day..really funny