Due to the endless lockdown no more barbers- my hair is growing unattended- I look like Fabio now (maybe slightly less handsome). My beard looks like Jesus. What to do??
Umm, dig into your wife's sewing box, steal her scissors, and go to work. She will kill you for ruining her sewing scissors and at that point you will never need to worry about hair growth again.
I once told my stylist that I was going to let my hair grow until it's long enough to donate. Then I was going to buy a Norelco and fire her. Took a few moments before that sank in. Then she hit me.
Go bald my friend ,this its the way to go .Loot at me how good i look and i go bald but now my hair grow again
Embrace the beard, in regards to the haircut just order a cheap machine from amazon it will do the trick. I wouldn't risk it with the scissors
They're called scissors. Use this other thing called a "mirror" to get the front right, and for the back? run your finger up the back of your neck until you feel the base of the skull, there should be a depression where the two meet unless you're up over 400 pounds with "no neck" and five chins. Use that as a guide to get the back straight. As to the beard, it's called a razor, or if you want to keep it, use a pair of electric shears with one of the attachments to control the length. In other words, learn to adult.
Beard like Jesus? You have never tried shaving at home? And while you are at it, consider shaving the head too! It'll come back by the time lockdown is over.
OMG, I feel your pain dude. I just try to not look in the mirror, but when I do, I think of myself as Christ lol