Mafia Wars Annihilation - New CB Product - $8,000 salespage

I see why he did it, no one likes getting letters
from lawyers lol.

But yea, I don't want anyone worrying that I
will close down the site at the first sign of a
letter.

 

*snort* I do webhosting. I;d be happy to go a single day without one.

 

I seriously think that you should actually play the game for a week before you build the guide. Your sales page does not convey what a real mafia wars "don" should.
People in mafia wars are not after "cars" or "weapons". And that is what the top headline in your sales page says. I seriously doubt that your copywriter actually had any knowledge about mafia wars. He or she just wrote the sales page thinking that mafia wars must be near about the same as what other online role playing games are. But I'm sorry dude, every game is different. And this is not a "role playing game" like wow or eve. It is a text based game that works in a way completely different from those "massively multiplayer games".

I am playing the game for months. I do have hundreds of millions mafia $ and i know what the Mafia players actually need.

What things are they short of?

They need more reward points. They need to build a bigger mafia, add more mafia members in the fastest possible way, level up as fast as possible and some information that will allow them not to do those "offers" or pay up to zynga for reward points. There are various other things that you need to tell the mafia gamers in the sales page. But I don't think i need to explain them all here.

I seriously doubt that your copywriter knows "anything" about the game. In my opinion, he or she has done "No research" before writing the sales page. And that is probably the reason why the mafia conversions are so low (these are like 1:150 - 1:200 for me even with a personal sounding presell page.

I think there is still room for some real mafia player to enter this niche with a better sales page.

 

I've played the game for months and also have hundreds
of millions of mafia $ etc etc.

The point of you posting that reply was pointless really,
if you think it could be done better, then get someone
to work with you and dominate this niche...

Instead of doing nothing and "saying" you know it all.

P.S - I'm not being nasty or anything, but it's just silly
when people post replies like that.

 

I quite like the look of this, you should maybe add some email and article templates to the affiliate page.

Also maybe some animated banners.

Regards.