What is the funniest joke you've ever heard?

Discussion in 'Movies, Music & TV' started by Efsane 66, Jan 30, 2009.

  1. #1
    :D haha :d

    The Twisted Jungle

    A little rabbit is happily running through the forest when he stumbles upon a giraffe rolling a joint.

    The rabbit looks at her and says, "Giraffe, my friend, Think about what you're doing to yourself! Come with me running through the forest, you'll see, you'll feel so much better!" The giraffe looks at him, looks at the joint, tosses it and goes off running with the rabbit.

    Then they come across an elephant doing coke. So the rabbit again says, "Elephant my friend, why do you do this? Think about what you're doing to yourself! Come running with us through the pretty forest, you'll see, you'll feel so good!" The elephant looks at them, looks at his razor, mirror and all, then tosses them and starts running with the rabbit and giraffe.

    The three animals then come across a lion about to shoot up. "Lion my friend, why do you do this? Think about what you're doing to yourself! Come running with us through the sunny forest, you will feel so good!" The lion looks at him, puts down his needle, and starts to beat the shit out of the little rabbit.

    The giraffe and elephant watch in horror, then finally obtain the presence of mind to pull the lion off the rabbit. "Lion," they reprimand, "why’d you do that? He was merely trying to help us all!"

    The lion answers, "That little fucker has me running around the forest like an idiot for hours every time he's on ecstasy!"
     
    Efsane 66, Jan 30, 2009 IP
  2. bunty_cms

    bunty_cms Banned

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    #2
    Funny.
    Here comes mine,
    Public service announcements around the world.

    USA: “It’s ten o’clock. Do you know where your children are?”

    Italy: “It’s ten o’clock. Do you know where your husband is?”

    France: “It’s ten o’clock. Do you know where your wife is?”

    Poland: “It’s ten o’clock. Do you know what time it is?”
     
    bunty_cms, Feb 28, 2009 IP
  3. shubhamjain1

    shubhamjain1 Peon

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    #3
    Here is a hindi one..!!

    Madhumakhi ke ghutne ko kya kehte hain????





    Bikini [ Bee ki Knee ]
     
    shubhamjain1, Feb 28, 2009 IP
  4. goatblack

    goatblack Member

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    #4
    yea..the hindi joke was really funny
     
    goatblack, Mar 5, 2009 IP
  5. justingh

    justingh Peon

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    #5
    Any translation for those of us who are not hindi? :D
     
    justingh, Mar 5, 2009 IP
  6. sar420

    sar420 Notable Member

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    #6
    Yeah I'l do that fr you:

    Q: What do you call a honey bee's kneecap?
    A: Bikini (Bee ki* knee - means bee's knee)


    Ki is a Hindi word used instead of the apostrophe in English
     
    sar420, Mar 5, 2009 IP
  7. manlyseo

    manlyseo Banned

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    #7
    heres is my one...

    once a blind man got in to the barber shop thinking that it is a hotel... what are here to eat? ,he asks.... he got replied, Cutting and shaving... blind man said give me two plates
     
    manlyseo, Mar 5, 2009 IP
  8. sar420

    sar420 Notable Member

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    #8
    There was a woman who said to her husband:

    "Now be an angel and let me drive..."

    So he did,

    And now he is!
     
    sar420, Mar 5, 2009 IP
  9. shubhamjain1

    shubhamjain1 Peon

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    #9
    Boy to father : How much is 5 + 5????
    Father: Idiot, full, duffer you don't even know this?? Bring a calculator and I will show you how.!!
     
    shubhamjain1, Mar 5, 2009 IP
  10. shubhamjain1

    shubhamjain1 Peon

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    #10
    Boy: I will KISS you without touching.
    Girl: Impossible.
    Boy: Bet of 20-20??
    Girl: Ok!

    Boy KISSED girl tightly!

    Girl: You touched
    Boy: Yeah! Take 20 Rupess.!!!
     
    shubhamjain1, Mar 5, 2009 IP
  11. mikebx

    mikebx Peon

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    #11
    a joke my father told me when i was little, i don't remember it now
     
    mikebx, Mar 6, 2009 IP
  12. BlueCheri

    BlueCheri Peon

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    #12
    here is mine.......
    one fly sits on the head of a bald person
    on which other fly says:amazing....what a beautiful house you have got!
    the first fly:thats still a plot!!!!!!!!!!!!
     
    BlueCheri, Mar 7, 2009 IP
  13. fancymouj

    fancymouj Peon

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    #13
    There was a woman who said to her husband:

    "Now be an angel and let me drive..."

    So he did,

    And now he is!
     
    fancymouj, Mar 8, 2009 IP
  14. sar420

    sar420 Notable Member

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    #14
    isn't this the same joke that I wrote some posts back? You just copied without attribution? Or do you like my joke but forgot to mention it?
     
    sar420, Mar 8, 2009 IP
  15. HorrorMovies

    HorrorMovies Notable Member

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    #15
    My favourite one would get me banned if I posted it here lol... Some good ones though :)
     
    HorrorMovies, Mar 8, 2009 IP
  16. anildewani

    anildewani Peon

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    #16
    Hahaha.. this thread is really funny :D

    Thanks for making me laugh :)
     
    anildewani, Mar 8, 2009 IP
  17. Manthony

    Manthony Peon

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    #17
    How do you get a witch pregnant?








    You fuck her.
     
    Manthony, Mar 10, 2009 IP
  18. aTk

    aTk Peon

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    #18
    Thats funny :)
     
    aTk, Mar 10, 2009 IP