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Google Over.

Discussion in 'Google' started by roadies, Apr 12, 2006.

  1. #1
    Looking in my crystal ball, events that will happen most likely in our lifetime:

    1) Google Wallet is launched
    2) Not satisfied with Wallet, Google buys BankofAmerica.
    3) Not satisfied with BankOfGoogle, Google opens GoogleCasino MegaResort in Las Vegas. Slots and tables use your google account and your past search history to weight payouts. At home you get comped for AdWords clicks on Google sites.
    4) Not satisfied with Vegas, google opens GoogleCasino Monaco
    5) Not satisfied with a casino, Google buys all of Monaco. Renames it MonaGoogacle.

    1) Google base was launched.
    2) Not satisfied Google buys out craigslist and replaces all their pages with a 404 that says "All your base are belong to Google"
    3) Instead of battling all the AdultFriendFinder spam, Google buys AdultFriendFinder.
    4) Not satisfied with Google AdultListBase, google opens Google Strip Clubs of America.
    5) Google cancels "Bring Girls to Work Day" and starts "Send (18+) Girls to work day" in its place.

    1) Google purchased Writely.
    2) Google launches Google OS with Google Office.
    3) Google stiffarms IBM, Apple, and AMD that only GoogleOS can run on their hardware or google will ban all Google sites from working on the hardware.
    4) BlueScreenOfDeath is replaced with "All your base are belong to Google" error.
    5) Larry and Sergey raise their annual salaries to $2 per year. Declared richest men in world.
    6) Google vs. US Government in antitrust and monopoly court cases.
    7) Google settles by buying US Government and paying its National Debt off. US citizens are now called Googlers. Illegal immigrants are now known as 302s. Green-cards are referred to as Reinclusion Requests. The constitution is referred to as "Guidelines".

    1) Google buys AOL. Changes name to GOAL, redirects google.com to GOAL.com
    2) Oops. They used a 302.
    3) Google Over.



    (ok, ok, I know 302 jokes are old, but still seemed appropriate). ;)
     
    roadies, Apr 12, 2006 IP
    Moe likes this.
  2. jackburton2006

    jackburton2006 Peon

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    #2
    Funny, but for a bunch of hippies, the Google guys sure seem intent on taking over the world, don't they? :/
     
    jackburton2006, Apr 12, 2006 IP
  3. sketch

    sketch Well-Known Member

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    #3
    Am I the only one who knows Yahoo already has a "Wallet"? I've never seen anyone mention it when referring to Google Wallet...
     
    sketch, Apr 12, 2006 IP
  4. john269

    john269 Notable Member

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    #4
    I read all of your post and it made me lol.
     
    john269, Apr 12, 2006 IP
  5. MikeSwede

    MikeSwede Peon

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    #5
    Google is not taking over the world, just what is profitable and where they can display their ads to make more money. Have an office package where you can include Google ads when you send your documents, GMail and you'll be allowed to add ads people can click on or just show them for all free users of your email software... google is not dumb, they have lots of data gathered from sites with Analytics and search results and from that they know what goes, what people are interested in, demographics and everything else and from that they can start bulding an empire just like MS... don't invent anything if you can steal an idea and make it yours....
     
    MikeSwede, Apr 12, 2006 IP
  6. jimkarter

    jimkarter Notable Member

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    #6
    lolz..good one..:)
     
    jimkarter, Apr 12, 2006 IP
  7. roadies

    roadies Well-Known Member

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    #7
    wowsers Mike its all a joke. :D (but I do agree with you, Google is not full of a bunch of dumb suits. They know what they are doing and where they want to go). I use google, a lot. But do utilize a lot of other companies offerings too.

    Anyway, after a recent guantlet through Google SERPS:

    1) Google takes a good look at post-BigDaddy index, notices its all Blogs, Article Repositories, Directories and Amazon dev sites.
    2) Google checks a year later and notices the index is the same type of content.
    3) Google says "erm ok, what the hell..." and informs everyone the only way to get into the index is to have a blog. Guidelines are updated. Reinclusion Requests are added to Ping-o-matic.com pinging service.
     
    roadies, Apr 13, 2006 IP
  8. pkchukiss

    pkchukiss Peon

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    #8
    I don't think Google has come to a stage where they could dominate the world -- that is solely Microsoft territory.

    The good news is that capitalism will ensure that Microsoft, as well as other software makers will try their best to out-do Google.
     
    pkchukiss, Apr 13, 2006 IP
  9. BNix

    BNix Peon

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    #9
    Yahoo was realease Yahoo! Directpay to compete with paypal , but failed

    Google wallet may compete with paypal , and Win !
    All your payment is just open phone / laptop / pda , logged in to google wallet , and transfer money to gov , bank , shop that is Google Wallet Authorized
     
    BNix, Apr 13, 2006 IP
  10. BNix

    BNix Peon

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    #10
    I love this , All citizens are known as Googlers.
    It may not a joke , but the world's future ;)

    I'm just realized Shawn back to adsense
     
    BNix, Apr 13, 2006 IP
    roadies likes this.
  11. dburdon

    dburdon Peon

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    #11
    Google will grow at the current rate until they start finding it increasingly difficult to find new ideas. Then the accountants will take over. They will demonstrate that Google could make more money by being smaller. Then the HR people will require increasing amounts of money to manage the downsizing. Then competition will realise that the young 1998 version of Google is now a bloated and decaying version of its former self. Then Google will get defensive a la MSN, IBM and all the companies that went before them. They will be consumed by their own strategic thinking and the world will move on.
     
    dburdon, Apr 13, 2006 IP
  12. john269

    john269 Notable Member

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    #12
    I agree!

    Google will grow at it's current rate, but will then start to slow down and then will level of a little bit and will then see a seesaw type of thing.

    I don't think know business can keep on growing at a speedy rate. It has to slow down some time and start to level off.
     
    john269, Apr 14, 2006 IP
  13. roadies

    roadies Well-Known Member

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    #13
    Yeah, I think Google will slow a bit too, just because they are nothing without their users and users will keep them in check. Its not to hard to type in a different url in your browser, just have to break a habit.

    Walmart, DollarTree, and 7-Eleven have been growing at a very fast rate for the past couple of decades with no signs of slowing down.
     
    roadies, Apr 14, 2006 IP
  14. Lpspider

    Lpspider Well-Known Member

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    #14
    Good stuff.
     
    Lpspider, Apr 14, 2006 IP
  15. Moe

    Moe Peon

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    #15
    My favorites:

    "Not satisfied Google buys out craigslist and replaces all their pages with a 404 that says "All your base are belong to Google"

    "Google settles by buying US Government and paying its National Debt off. US citizens are now called Googlers. Illegal immigrants are now known as 302s. Green-cards are referred to as Reinclusion Requests. The constitution is referred to as "Guidelines".

    Good stuff, thanks for the laugh.
     
    Moe, Apr 14, 2006 IP
    roadies likes this.
  16. anjanesh

    anjanesh Well-Known Member

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    #16
    Maybe after all of Google's taking over, Microsoft will take over Google !
     
    anjanesh, Apr 17, 2006 IP
  17. yeahyeahyeah

    yeahyeahyeah Peon

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    #17
    the secret is enabling advanced options when the free OS comes out
     
    yeahyeahyeah, May 1, 2006 IP
  18. Lpspider

    Lpspider Well-Known Member

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    #18
    yeah yeah. Maybe. :rolleyes:
     
    Lpspider, May 1, 2006 IP
  19. redhits

    redhits Notable Member

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    #19
    Jeeez i wohe that google won't become that company from Antitrust Movie!
     
    redhits, May 2, 2006 IP
  20. roadies

    roadies Well-Known Member

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    #20
    I don't see Larry and Sergey becoming Enron guys anytime soon. Eric Schmidt perhaps, but he first has to satisfy his "kill Microsoft" alterior motives.
     
    roadies, May 4, 2006 IP