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Just for Laughs +18 only

Discussion in 'Movies, Music & TV' started by Ashwini, Jun 9, 2007.

  1. #1
    Some nice joke i have heard these days..like to share with you all.

    DON'T LOOK AT NAKED LADY
    Boy 1: Why do you run from a naked lady?
    Boy 2: Becos my mum said that if I look at a naked
    lady, I'll turn into stone. A part of me is getting hard already!

    NAMES OF WIVES
    A malay man had 4 wives, and he called his...
    4th wife..... baby doll
    3rd wife.....china doll
    2nd wife.....barbie doll
    1st wife..... panadol !

    HOW INDIA GOT ITS NAME
    This is how India got its name.....
    The king was having sex with his mistress while
    thinking a name of his
    country and his mistress ask him "is it In Dear?"...

    RESEARCH FINDING
    Research shows men are fatter than women because
    every-night men get fresh milk & 2 papayas
    women only get 1 banana, 2 peanuts & 1 tea-spoon of starch!

    ARAB MAN
    An arab was being interviewed at a US checkpoint.
    'Your name pls.'?
    "Abdul Aziz "
    "Sex? "
    "Six times a week!! "
    "No, no, I mean male or female! "
    "Doesn't matters, sometimes even camel !"

    SERVICE
    Sex is like a restaurant.
    Sometimes you get full satisfactory service, and
    sometimes you have to be
    satisfied with self-service"

    HAPPY MAN
    What makes a happy man?
    Daughter on the cover of cosmo.
    Son on the cover of sports illustrated.
    Mistress on the cover of playboy
    and .. Wife on the cover of "missing
    persons"

    SWIMSUIT
    Why was the 2-piece swimsuit invented?
    To separate the HAIRY section from the DAIRY
    section.

    GOOD AMBITION
    Teacher: What do you want to become?
    Little Johnny: Doctor !!
    Teacher: Why?
    Little Johnny: Coz its the only profession where u can tell a woman to take
    off her clothes and ask her husband to pay for it.

    DENTIST
    Woman complaining to dentist: "It's so painful, I'll rather have a baby
    than have a tooth removed."
    Dentist: "Make up your mind soon, I'll adjust the chair accordingly."

    VIRGIN
    Old lady, 85, a virgin, about to die. wanted her
    tombstone to read :
    BORN A VIRGIN, LIVED A VIRGIN, DIED A VIRGIN.
    The engraver shortened it to: " RETURNED UNOPENED "

    OLD MAN AND YOUNG GIRL
    75 yr old man got married to a 15 yr girl.
    On their first night both were crying - why???
    Coz she didn't know anything, and he had forgotten
    everything


    Post if you have any.
    Thanks.
    Ashwini
     
    Ashwini, Jun 9, 2007 IP
    leet likes this.
  2. mitcharr

    mitcharr Notable Member

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    #2
    lol they are great!! keep posting more please!
     
    mitcharr, Jun 9, 2007 IP
  3. temujin

    temujin Peon

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    #3
    lol , crude and funny.
     
    temujin, Jun 9, 2007 IP
  4. Felu

    Felu Peon

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    #4
    haha those are funny. not necessarily for 18+, younger people can have a laugh if they can understand it.
     
    Felu, Jun 9, 2007 IP
  5. Ashwini

    Ashwini Peon

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    #5
    Thanks for your appreciation guys..will keep posting more soon . he he he

    Thanks
    ashwini
     
    Ashwini, Jun 9, 2007 IP
  6. getjimmy

    getjimmy Prominent Member

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    #6
    ha ha nice jokes,add some more.
     
    getjimmy, Jun 9, 2007 IP
  7. uttoransen

    uttoransen Prominent Member

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    #7
    nice, great jokes there! and a must required +18 tag aswell!
    looking foreword to read more of your jokes, just keep them comming:D
     
    uttoransen, Jun 9, 2007 IP
  8. Rohit patel

    Rohit patel Prominent Member

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    #8
    Those are great jokes and really funny one. Please post more jokes for us.:)
     
    Rohit patel, Jun 10, 2007 IP
  9. Silent Hill

    Silent Hill Peon

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    #9
    RESEARCH FINDING joke was the best.

    Some jokes from me,


    Catch her by her waist…
    Bring her home..
    Keep ur hand on her neck
    Put ur lips on her lips
    & have a …
    …nice drink…PEPSI


    He came at night,
    explored my body,
    got on top of me,
    touched me, he bit,
    sucked, swalowd,
    when he was satisfyed,
    he left, i was hurt,
    .
    .
    .
    BLOODY… MOSQUITO !!!!


    A girl phoned me
    the other day and said …
    “Come on over, there’s nobody home.”
    I went over. Nobody was home
     
    Silent Hill, Jun 10, 2007 IP
  10. edhan

    edhan Active Member

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    #10
    Nice jokes! Hmm.... can I have your permission to add these jokes in my Jokes Site?

    It will be nice to have people laughing when reading them in my jokes site.

    Thanks!
     
    edhan, Jun 10, 2007 IP
  11. Silent Hill

    Silent Hill Peon

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    #11
    I think that anyone can use these jokes.
     
    Silent Hill, Jun 10, 2007 IP
  12. edhan

    edhan Active Member

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    #12
    Oh, okay. I will use your jokes first while I wait for Ashwini to answer. I just want to make sure as I do not want anyone accusing me of using their jokes.

    Thanks.
     
    edhan, Jun 10, 2007 IP
  13. Xuxa

    Xuxa Banned

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    #13
    nice jokes, post some more if you have any
     
    Xuxa, Jun 10, 2007 IP
  14. talvehtia

    talvehtia Well-Known Member

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    #14
    Arab Man and How India Got Its Name really cracked me up. Very good jokes pal :)
     
    talvehtia, Jun 10, 2007 IP
  15. chrisj383

    chrisj383 Well-Known Member

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    #15
    they great, had me laughing all the way through reading them lol

    chris
     
    chrisj383, Jun 10, 2007 IP
  16. Disguised

    Disguised Notable Member

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    #16
    Very nice jokes Ashwini

    "Arab Man" and " Self-Service" were both awesome. :D
     
    Disguised, Jun 10, 2007 IP
  17. login

    login Notable Member

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    #17
    Thanks, a good break from the SEO stuff.
     
    login, Jun 10, 2007 IP
  18. MikeLugar

    MikeLugar Well-Known Member

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    #18
    lol you do realize if you put a "+18 only" tag on the thread people under 18 automatically click on the thread lol
     
    MikeLugar, Jun 10, 2007 IP
  19. timsdd

    timsdd Peon

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    #19
    most of them were somewhat funny but I was exactly lol'ing :eek:
     
    timsdd, Jun 10, 2007 IP
  20. Ashwini

    Ashwini Peon

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    #20
    Surely you can use these jokes at your site.

    Will be coming up with more jokes:eek: Keep eyeing on this thread :D


    Also do post if you have any good laughter collection let's make this thread a refreshing one :p
    Regards to you all.
    Ashwini
     
    Ashwini, Jun 10, 2007 IP